I'm trying to keep this quote in my head as much as possible. I may have to reread Do It Scared by Ruth Soukup. I am a perfectionist, and because of this, I procrastinate a LOT!! Plus I have my chronic illnesses that make it difficult. I should be doing what I can every day, but lately I've been letting that get in the way. If I have a few good minutes or hours I should be using them to full advantage, and instead I've been letting my perfectionism get in the way. I can't finish the whole project because my illness will stop me from doing the whole thing, so why bother starting? I get in my own way too much. I'm trying to let go and start small and just do what I can, when I can. My craft area is starting to look better. My room looks worse, but is actually better because a lot of the stuff is out of the way, I just need to rewash a lot of blankets and linens that got left in a basket too long and got not clean smelling.
I finally cleaned out the linen closet and got two small bags of donate items. I accidentally bought the small kitchen bags instead of the large ones. Oops. But the craft area is looking much better and I'm slowly catching up on laundry. I've given everyone the deadline of next Saturday for bedrooms to be clean, otherwise whatever is left out on the floor is getting donated. The exception being the window unit AC that DH has to move, but his back is hurting, so I don't know when he'll be able to do so. But, I can start practicing sewing now!!
I'm not going to let my insecurities get in the way any more! I'm going to Do It Scared!! I know if I put my mind to something and truly work at it, I can accomplish it.
So today is Day 1
I'm starting working out today. Next week Sunday will be my rest day, I'll still be doing yoga (that will be an everyday thing) and the 100 Ab Challenge by Blogilates. But for cardio and other strength training, Sunday will be a rest day. As I mentioned yesterday, I'll be going to 2 shakes a day at least (breakfast and lunch) but they will be later in the day since I'm not really a breakfast person, I think I'll wait and have my morning shake after cooling off after my morning workout. Dinner will either be another shake or a Paleo meal that is small portioned. I'm making a roast with carrots, onions, and potatoes today. DH made some chicken breasts for me yesterday when he made chicken alfredo. Thank goodness, I can't have the lactose or the pasta! I did have some last night. Pasta is a weakness, and my brain went, but you won't be having any for a very long time, if ever again! So I caved and had some. ODD ended up coming down to get some water (this was around 10 PM) and tried to get onto me for what I was eating. I get so frustrated when she tries to tell me what I can and cannot do. She does it to her sister and tries to do it to me. So frustrating! I know she means well, but she ends up sounding rude and.... well I won't go into it, but I got rather cross with her. My Day One is today, not yesterday. I even had half a chocolate shake yesterday. I ended up regretting it, but it was a yummy way to say goodbye at the time, LOL. I'll still have chocolate (found a good chocolate brownie Paleo recipe) and ice cream (banana) but it will be much healthier.
But along those lines of thinking, I've got to get my rear in gear and start working towards my goals, not stagnating or going backwards. So yesterday I spent some time updating my ToDoist so that I've got reminders on what to do every day that I can check off. Not just for homemaking or working out, but everything from sewing to crocheting to training my dog. I think that having it where I can use it on the computer or on my phone will really help. And having the ones that have reminders set to pop up on my phone (like drinking breakfast and taking meds) will help me to stay on task and not forget the big or small stuff. Instead of a list of things to do in each area daily, I just put the room or rooms I'm supposed to clean (every day is a different area of the house I'm going to work on and every week is a different area to work on decluttering).
I'm just praying that I can accomplish a little every day. I know chronic illness will get the better of me some days, but I usually have a few hours or stints of time that I'm doing good enough to get at least a few things done. I want to have that satisfaction when I go to bed, know I did the best I could and got at least a few things accomplished. Like yesterday. The craft area looks so much better (still have some work to do) and the laundry is closer to being completed. I'll have room in the linen closet (hopefully, it is a small one) for the stuff that has yet to be rewashed, and I have some more things to go through and donate. I found a crocheted shawl that my sister used to use as a wrap in the mornings walking around the house I grew up in, so I'm going to find a picture I have with her in it and send that and the shawl to my niece. I think she will like having it. I know I won't use it, and it will just stay in the linen closet, so may as well send it to her. I don't know who made it, someone in our family did.
I have decided to go through my jewelry. I don't have much that I actually like or wear. Some of it is stuff I made that I no longer like, a lot are things that were given to me. I have some of my Mom's jewelry, which I will put away in a safe place and keep to give to my kids, or perhaps wear when I lose weight. It is mostly stuff from when she was younger, and she had such tiny fingers that most of it does not fit me. I have one of her wedding ring sets. Beautiful, and hopefully one day one of my DD's can wear it. Probably YDD, she is the smaller of the two. But I decided I wanted to start slowly rebuilding my jewelry to suit me, not random stuff that other people gave me because they didn't want it or whatever. I am going to keep the real stuff and but it away with Mom's stuff (her stuff is real too) but the rest I'm going to let the kids go through and pick out what they want and then whatever is left will be donated.
This is something that is very hard to do, but I know is very important. If you go into something thinking you can't possibly do it, then you are probably right. I want to succeed. Not only in weight loss but in my other endeavors as well. But I must get in the mindset that I CAN do this. And that I am worth the time and effort it takes to put into reaching my goals.
So today, on
I will put aside my doubt, I work work towards my goals, I will write them out (putting that as a task on ToDoist, so I'll actually take time to work out my small goals to work toward reaching my big goals!!) and I will reach them!!
Next goals for:
Weight Loss: Lose 10 pounds. I'll weigh and measure on Monday as usual, and my next weight loss goal will be to reach 10 pounds below that.
Fitness: Be able to walk 20 minutes straight. Finish 30 day 100 Ab Challenge. Yoga every day and see improvement on flexibility.
Nutrition: Stick to shakes 2 times a day for 30 days. Drink the full 64 fl oz of water every day for next 30 days. Take ALL of my vitamins every day.
Sewing: learn how to sew small bow ties for Pickles the small dog. Also work on learning how to hem pants and jeans
Crochet: work daily on crocheting projects for family for this winter, and gift for Christmas for our hostess when we go to NJ.
Routines: stick to daily routines as closely as possible, keep computer time in check and spend more time with the kids when they get home after school and in the mornings before school. Keep track of daily routines on ToDoist, update and change as needed, keep flexible.
Training the dog; work daily on her fear of the front yard (will be working in the garage with the door open and her favorite treats: all beef hot dogs) start learning new fun tricks and read the book on how to work through her fear. Start exercising her more, she has become a very lazy dog and sleeps a lot, so lots of outside time in the backyard and playing fetch as well as working with tasks/commands she knows and toys that keep her mind sharp, lots of games. I told DH to buy her some cow hooves, but the hates the smell so did not. She is still a pup and needs to chew. So she chewed the edge of our really nice rug. I'm miffed, but if the turn it around, that corner will be under the bean bag in the corner, so for now we can delay buying a new rug. The kids tried to hide it by putting a tray table on top of it, which only worked to draw my attention to it.
Kids: keep kids engaged, get them working out, spend individual time with them and when with them, really focus on them, and don't get distracted by electronics or whatnot. They are only this young once.
I've always said something similar to this. Bravery/courage is doing something even though you are afraid, it is not the absence of fear. I'm afraid I will fail, fall on my face, all of those things. But I'm going to do it anyway. Because I refuse to let fear rule me. I'm going to #DoItScared!!
Hope you have a wonderful Sunday, and do something to make you happy today!!