CROUCHINGFLEA
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MOST Random

Wednesday, August 14, 2019


"Don't just be some random person. Be the MOST random person." -Jenny Lawson

I LOVE this quote!! Her book certainly is entertaining, and it helps to add humor to chronic illness to make it easier to deal with. I love her take on life.

I didn't get as much done yesterday as I would have liked to, but I did get more than normal done, so I call that a win! Both dogs got washed. I bathed Hope, my Golden, and my youngest bathed Pickles our little half corgi/half beagle. He did NOT want to go. He is getting cantankerous in his old age! He fussed and growled and barked, but in the end, he had a fun after-bath like he normally does, nose diving into the carpet, LOL. Today I'm hoping to get a bit more done. I ran out of steam around dinner time and around lunch time. I mean, completely out of energy I could have fallen asleep right then. At lunch time I laid down, and Hope laid down with her head partially on my tummy and proceeded to fall asleep and growl/snore!! So cute!!

But then ODD came in to talk to me, and was troubled. I've been worried about her for a while because of some of her drawings and she says she writes dark poetry and doesn't want me to read it, till yesterday. But I had just sat down and did not have the energy to get back up and go over to her computer to sit down. I literally had no spoons left. I won't go into it, but she is having some mental health issues. This is something my therapist warned me about, that she might have bipolar or depression like me, since it can be passed down through genetics. She is having troubling thoughts. I don't know whether to take her to a psychologist to get diagnosed first, or go straight to a psychiatrist. I told DH and he said he had no idea, then went on about how we need to spend more time with the kids.. um, I do? He needs to spend more time with them. I do need to spend more time now that I'm feeling better than I was, I want to spend my entire afternoon/evening with them, but sometimes I run out of spoons. I told her she did not need to see my therapist (she does not like her because she is afraid that my therapist will blame her for my problems for some reason, I assured her that was not the case, but I already knew she didn't like her, so I will find someone else, besided, I don't want talk therapy for her right yet, she needs to be diagnosed first.), but a MD of sorts to better diagnose her if she indeed has anything other than normal teenage angst. Plus I'm going to look into the side effects of the ADHD meds she is on.

I'm not doing so well with my depression as is, it has been a really difficult time the past few days slogging through it and trying to get anything done. I want DH to take me to a craft store and pick out some yarn. I've decided to get everyone to pick out some good wool yarn and I'll make matching hats, fingerless gloves or mittens, and scarves, for our winter trip up North!! And then I want to make the same out of DH's best friend's wife's favorite color, as a Christmas gift and thank you for taking us around NY and helping us see the sites and such. I'm excited to go. Broadway! Can you imagine! But it is going to be so cold! And we are driving, not flying, DH thinks it will be cheaper. It will probably be easier on my nerves, the airports are bound to be clogged that time of year!!

I'm rethinking my workout routine. I walked on the treadmill for 15 minutes, did a few stability exercises, and then stretched. I tried really hard to muster the strength in the afternoon to do the Ab Challenge, but just could not, I was wore out. I think I need to build up my stamina before I go doing anything like the 100 Ab Challenge, sad as it makes me. I really want to be able to do more, but must deal with what I can do right now, and not what I wish I could do.

Today I'm going to work on finishing yesterday's to do list, and also work on researching hearth healthy meals for DH. He won't be happy, but if I can find things that taste good as well as are heart healthy, he won't complain as much.

Ah, my Golden is awake and letting the household know she is unhappy she has not been taken out yet, so I must go, lol

Hope you have a great day!

~Flea
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