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So much fear.

Friday, August 09, 2019

Why am I so scared to re-start this journey? I lost over 70 pounds 6 years ago and I have kept that off - the problem is I stopped 60 pounds short of the goal. I have been ok with this or at least I thought I was ok. My Doctor wanted me to see the lifestyle specialist which I figured would be a nutritionist. Nope, this is a therapist specializing in eating issues. Let’s be honest it’s almost given that I have emotional issues tied in with my weight problems. I turn 50 this year and I realize that but I also felt like “Hey, I got this!”. All the Dr asked me to do was track my food and walk each day. Interesting that it sent me into a spiral of hiding in Netflix, Instagram, and Facebook. If you had asked me 2 weeks ago “Are you honest with yourself?” I would have said yes with out hesitation, my current behavior says otherwise. It is deeply annoying that weight loss is SO MUCH MORE than just portion control and exercise. I need a place free of judgement, to work through my crap because friends and family often want to offer helpful solutions and lets face it I know how to measure portions, eat 3 meals a day get more protein and sweat for 30 minutes 4 times a week - - what I apparently don’t know how to do is turn off those inner voices. Where do they pop out of?? I can be so tough. I took a surfing lesson this year. My surfing adventure started with a panic attack- odd since I kayak, snorkel and love the ocean. I took a deep breath talked my self off the ledge and went surfing. Which I hated!! The whole time I wished I was on a stand up paddle board or in a kayak not paddling with my arms face down on a board. So why is tracking my food so scary? I guess I will chew on that this week and let you know what I find. Feel free to share your journey with me any and all insight is welcome. For now I need to track today’s food then go to the grocery store maybe I’ll even manage to meal prep this week- unless something comes out on Netflix 🤣😂🤣
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
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    233 days ago
  • no profile photo CD24510184
    We are here to support you. We are here to find encouragement as well. emoticon
    239 days ago
  • RHOOK20047
    Welcome to SparkPeople. We are all here for the same reason, no matter what our personal story is. We are here to help each other to get to that healthy point we want to be in our lives. It is not going to be easy, but it is attainable. Make small goals and they will lead to big successes. You have to make you #1 and tell yourself that you are worth it. And remember you didn't gain the weight overnight and you won't lose it overnight. It takes time, determination, motivation and support. You can get it all right here! If you don't take care of yourself you can't take care of anyone else. If I can help in anyway, feel free to reach out to me! You can do it! We are here to help! Welcome and get active on this site. emoticon
    240 days ago
  • no profile photo HOTPINKCAMARO49
    Awesome! Way to go!
    240 days ago
    1. Be gentle w/ yourself 2. Be honest w/ yourself 3. You know what you need to do.Get to it & take it one day at a time 💕 4. Always tell your negative self-talk to shut its pie-hole ;) pump yourself up with affirmations and self-love. You can do it!
    240 days ago
    240 days ago
    Please do not be afraid. You have lots to be excited about. Losing 70 pounds and not gaining any back is amazing. You need to live each day being the lady you were when you made yourself be on track and lose the 70 pounds. You can make those 60 pounds fall off by getting motivated to being an active spark person and making each new day of wanting to lose. You are amazing now live without being frustrated with the fantatic lady you are.
    240 days ago
    hello, I can relate to your post about how weight loss is so much more than exercise and portion control, for me its getting reconnect with that inner child, and its slow step, when we are working on the emotion part that connects us to our weight.
    240 days ago
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