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08/05/19 Spread the Light

Monday, August 05, 2019



"There are two ways of spreading light: To be the candle or the mirror that reflects it." Edith Wharton



"That's it…a screwdriver, duct tape and wd-40!" A plugger considers himself "getting lucky" when he walks into a room and remembers why he went there.








Three bulls heard the rancher was bringing another bull onto the ranch.

First Bull: “I’ve been here five years. I’m not giving this new bull any of my 100 cows.”

Second Bull: “I’ve been here three years and have earned my right to 50 cows. I’m keeping all my cows.”

Third Bull: “I’ve only been here a year, and so far, you guys have only let me have 10 cows. I may not be as big as you fellows, but I’m keeping all 10 of my cows.”

Just then an 18-wheeler pulls up in the pasture carrying the biggest bull they’ve ever seen. At 4,700 pounds, each step he takes strains the steel ramp.

First Bull: “I think I can spare a few cows for our new friend.”

Second Bull: “I actually have too many cows to take care of. I can spare a few. I’m certainly not looking for an argument.”

They look over at the third bull and find him pawing the dirt, shaking his horns and snorting.

First Bull: “Son, don’t be foolish – let him have some of your cows and live to tell about it.”

Third Bull: “Hell, he can have all my cows. I’m just making sure he knows I’m a BULL.”

dailyjokes.com


American Bandstand debuted this day on nationwide TV in 1957 with Dick Clark as emcee. It would become a mainstay of American culture and air for 32 years.
--Work Like a Dog Day: a reminder to really dig in and give it your all; also, maybe give a treat to someone who has been working some really long hours.
--Underwear Day: those bits of clothing we take for granted have a long history as mankind changed its design and materials looking for utility and comfort.
--Green Peppers Day: technically, green peppers are a fruit; full of vitamins, green peppers are added to many dishes to add taste and color.
--International Traffic Light Day: on the August 5, 1914, the first electric traffic light was installed in Cleveland, Ohio at the corner of E. 105th St and Euclid Ave; there was a set of lights for each direction but they had to be changed manually by someone in a booth; there was a sign version installed in 1868 London and was changed manually; the traffic lights continued to be improved but they still needed to changed by an officer till 1922 when timers were added to change the lights automatically.
--National Oyster Day: a salute to these delectable mollusks; there are over 100 species, each different because oysters tend to take on the characteristics of the water where they're growing.
--Civic Day in Canada: also called British Columbia Day, Heritage Day, Natal Day and even Terry Fox Day; the holiday is observed across Canada but the names are locality dependent; either way, enjoy your day off.
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