Tough few days
Monday, August 05, 2019
It’s been very stressful since May of this year. Dealing with pain issues, going to my brother’s house, being in an automobile accident, returning home only to find more stress.
My body’s response to anything right now is, nope I’m shutting down your energy levels.
I’m trying to remember to breathe and let go of various things. I’m grateful for my life and each day I wake up.
I broke down talking to my son this morning. I told him I had mentioned to my bff I might not be able to do our usual September trip and go to Florida. My wonderful son, reminded me of words I spoke many years ago about putting having fun and doing things I liked off because everyone was ahead of me. He told me that yes he does listen to what I say even when it doesn’t seem like it. Of course by then I was crying. He said the trips I have upcoming are important for me mentally and physically. I also told him I was afraid of the future. Seeing how much my life and abilities have gone down the past two years scares me. Despite what I’ve done it can’t be prevented or stopped. My future is now scary because of my losing ground. I’m not scared of dying, I’ve already died once. I’m so grateful that God gave me a second.
I’m being led down unfamiliar territory with my eyes. My vision is getting extremely near sighted. I have been dealing with wet macular degeneration for 10 1/2 years now. Maybe new issues are happening because of the extreme near sightedness. My vision is scaring me a lot, that I can’t deny. I’ve been working myself crazy on genealogy and typing recipes for my new cookbooks. Plus reading my many books. Add in an online course in seminary, my latest interest. My eyes tire out so much easier,
Maybe I’m trying to cram too much in? Add in my coloring app, and a few games I like to play. Plus tonight I went through unfollowing and deleting and hiding post, people and pages that show up on my Facebook. It’s been filled with arguing, political bs and hate in general. Several people are snoozed for 30 days. They may be removed yet from my life and Facebook. I’m trying to keep things positive and uplifting.
I appreciate each and everyone of y’all. I appreciate your prayers and I always say a pray back for you. I believe in miracles because this second chance is a miracle.
Thank you for reading my blog. Sending you love and hugs and prayers always