"You don't need a new sunrise to start over, you only need a new mindset."
Speaker: "The boiling frog theory states that if a frog is placed in boiling water, it will jump out, but if it is slowly heated, it will not perceive the danger and die.." Clueless: "I don't get the relevance..Isn't this supposed to be a seminar on climate change?"
A man walked into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him.
As he sat down, the waitress came over and asked for their orders.
The man said, “I’ll have a hamburger, fries and a coke.” Then he turned to the ostrich and asked, “What’s yours?”
“I’ll have the same,” said the ostrich.
A short time later the waitress returned with the order saying, “That will be $6.40 please.” So the man reached into his pocket and pulled out the exact change for payment.
The next day, the man and the ostrich came again and the man said, “I’ll have a hamburger, fries and a coke.” Then the ostrich said, “I’ll have the same.”
Once again the man reached into his pocket and paid with exact change.
This became a routine until late one evening, the two entered again.
“The usual?” asked the waitress. “No, it is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato, and salad,” said the man. “Same for me,” said the ostrich.
A short time later the waitress came with the order and said, “That will be $12.62.” Once again the man pulled the exact change out of his pocket and placed it on the table.
The waitress couldn’t hold back her curiosity any longer.
“Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change out of your pocket every time?”
“Well,” said the man, “several years ago I was cleaning the attic and I found an old lamp. When I rubbed it a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there.”
“That’s brilliant!” said the waitress. “Most people would wish for a million dollars or something, but you’ll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!”
“That’s right. Whether it’s a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there,” said the man.
The waitress asked, “One other thing, sir, what’s with the ostrich?”
The man sighed, paused, and answered, “My second wish was for a tall chick with long legs who agrees with everything I say.”
It's Stick Out Your Tongue Day! A tongue-in-cheek day to act silly and stick out your tongue just like a kid.
--National Raspberry Cake Day: a yummy way to use fresh raspberries; save me a slice.
--National Flitch Day: an old English custom going back to the 13th and 14th century; English tradition of giving a flitch of bacon to married couples who don't regret their wedding one year later.
--National Daiquiri Day: a salute to a drink invented in the early 1900's in a mining town in Santiago, Cuba by an engineer Jennings Stockton Cox. Cox came up with this concoction in an effort to cool down during the summer month, with a simple blend of lime juice, sugar and local Bacardi rum, over cracked ice. This he found to be the best way to boost the morale of mine workers during the hot months. Such was the success of Cox’s drink not only did he received a generous stipend from the company, he also received a monthly gallon of Bacardi to continue supplying the refreshing drink.