Happy Sunday! It's the first day of a new week!
Sunday, July 14, 2019
Good morning everybody!
It's been a while since I've written a blog post, but today I just felt like I wanted to catch up those of you who are still here. :-) I've been thinking a lot about why I keep making excuses and don't follow through when I "recommit." In essence, why I come and go on SP and every other thing I try to use to help me make changes.
I've come to the conclusion it isn't just one thing, but a series of things; some--most--aren't too flattering! My inner child runs my life, and she's a total brat! I am scared to be abstinent from foods that I know trigger eating binges. I am scared of being successful. I am impatient and want to see massive results immediately. I feel like I'm old and it's too late, so why bother. I don't think I like myself very much. Staying fat and unhealthy allows me to isolate and just not deal with other people beyond my work environment where I have to deal with them. I like doing what I want to do; when I want to do it, and that's NOT healthy stuff like dieting and exercising. I want it to magically happen without the initial pain and suffering of self-discipline. I could go on and on with similar admissions.
WOW! When I look at some of this, I just want to smack myself!
I love reading about others' success, and even thought it's rather damning of me, I wish for it on some level myself, or I wouldn't ever come back. THIS time, instead of making a bunch of grandiose promises, I think I'm going to try something very small which seems overwhelming in certain ways. I am going to commit to keeping myself accountable by sharing with y'all at least once a week and at least logging on to SP and reading through my coaching stuff daily. I tend to obsess, so simply logging on can throw me down the rabbit hole of staying on the computer all day and making huge plans I can't possible follow through since I DO have to go to work and such.
I'd be interested to know how any of you did the whole "starting small" thing without ripping out your hair with impatience. :-) I know I didn't get this way overnight, but I kinda do want it to change overnight. :-)
Until next time!