CROUCHINGFLEA
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Know Your Limits (just don't pay attention to them!)

Saturday, June 29, 2019



I love Firefly (in case the picture didn't give it away), and I love that quote. I'm learning to never put myself inside a box. You can do more than you think you can, you can exceed the limits you have put on yourself. Just like you should never put God in a box (something I've found, as a person who became a Christian as an adult and didn't grow up in church culture, that a LOT of people do), don't put yourself in one either. God has no limits, and when it comes to what he has called you to do on this Earth, you should not limit yourself either.

So, this morning, after a half a night of restful sleep, and a half a night of tossing and turning (better than normal, yay!), as I sip my coffee, I'm contemplating the box I've put myself in, and allowed other people's words to put me in. Yes, growing up being abused put a lot of those words in my head, but I'm the one that kept them there. It's time to step out of my box, out of my 'circle of comfort' and do things that make me uncomfortable, but also make me grow. I'm not going to jump in head first, I'm going to take things one step, one thought, at a time. I have several big goals I want to accomplish, and while working on several big goals at once will be hard, if I am willing to put in the effort, I think the rewards will be more than worth it.

I have 5 main goals: (in no particular order and yes, that is one more goal than I had a few days ago, I decided that one of them needed to be a goal on it's own and not lumped in with another one)

~Try to train my dog, with the help of a professional trainer once a week, to overcome her fears and then see if she can be trained as a service dog. If not, consider breeding her, it would be a way to make extra money, and I've always loved puppies. I'd prefer her to be a service dog if at all possible though!!!
~Homemaking. This entails so much to me! From creating a space at home where my family feels safe and peaceful, where dinner is on the table, fun is had, and love is shared, to making sure laundry is done and the house is clean and forming long lasting relationships with my kids and my husband.
~Time with God. We are starting at the beginning of the Bible, because that is where ODD wants to start, reading it outloud after dinner then having a Q&A. DH is not participating, so I'm winging it. I'm also wanting to get back in the habit of reading the Bible on my own, and doing my morning/evening devotional (they are short). It will take time to get into this habit. The most important to me right now is reading with the kids, as ODD is questioning and it is taking it's toll on her. I have no way of relating, I did not grow up Christian as she is.
~Learn to sew. I want to get so good that I can make not only my own clothes, but open up an online specialty store. I want to make my favorite kinds of fashion, but am also thinking of making clothes for people with disabilities. Perhaps both. We'll have to see where things go. And if I'm even any good at sewing!!
~Lose the rest of the weight/get in shape/get healthy. My health is concerning. I have several 'invisible illnesses' (which is why I want/need a service dog) and the healthier I am the easier it will be to take care of those chronic illnesses. My dog already seems to know when I have a migraine, if I can get her to be a SD, she can 'alert' me to when one is coming on. And if she is sensitive enough for that, she may be able to sense my seizures and 'alert' to those as well.

That really seems like a lot, but when you break it down into smaller and smaller steps and make a 'roadmap to success' that has your (in military terms) 'action plan' in place, it becomes a lot easier. The first month will be the most difficult. Getting into habits, making things a habit is hard. But it will be so worth it. I also have to remember that I can't start it all at once. There are a lot of 'pre' steps to this. I'm working on a list, and will stretch things out. With my pup, I'm starting training her more, she has gotten into pampered house-dog mode, and I have to start getting her more active, and more responsive to her commands she knows while waiting on when the training can restart with the trainer in mid-July. Plus, I found a book to help me teach her new, simple tricks that will help her focus, and she loves doing tricks and getting treats, so having more to do will be good for her. Lots of other examples I could give, but I'll save that for when I'm brainstorming!

For now, I'm going to get a 2nd cup of coffee, sit down with my Living Well Planner (thank you so much my SP friend who sent it to me!!) and watch the videos on how to get started.

Hope you have a wonderful morning and weekend!!

~Flea
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