CROUCHINGFLEA
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Grace vs Excuses/Monthly Sub Box?

Friday, June 28, 2019

I read a thing recently by Ruth Soukup (I know, I've been going on about her a lot recently, but I'm loving what I read from her!!) and so yesterday, even though I had just wrote a blog on no more excuses, I decided to give myself grace to take the day mostly off. Even though I had plans that needed doing and a house that needed cleaning, I needed the grace more.

It started to my TOM starting suddenly and ferociously. It always leaves me in pain and feeling weak, but it started worse than normal yesterday. Then I could feel a migraine starting, but I got up and got ready for the day anyway. Then, the person who was supposed to drive us to my ODD's doctor appointment, which I have to book a month in advance, calling me around the time we were supposed to leave my house to say she was just leaving her house - 45 minutes away - and could I just call the doctor's office and tell them we would be 10 minutes late. Um, no, I'm not going to lie to the doctor's office, I like this doctor and don't want to alienate her. Then it became a whole drama thing, I dislike drama, I used to have a lot of it in my life and I got rid of most of it, but this woman seems to thrive on it. By the time I finally got off the phone with her, about an hour later, both kids knew I was not feeling well. My migraine was much, much worse. So I told them we had the morning off, do whatever (within reason) they wanted to do (that they knew they were allowed to do) and we would start after lunch. Only I was still feeling awful by then, so we took the whole day. And I don't feel bad for it one bit. Because it was not an excuse not to do my daily work, I really want to get that done. And it was not an excuse to go lounge in bed, I was really in pain. It was giving myself the grace to take care of me, even though I really wanted to push through and get things done.

What I was feeling bad about was wanting to spend money on myself. I found a gravity blanket with great reviews, for less than a third of the price of most of the ones I've seen! To get the cheaper price I'd have to get a 15 pound one, and I'll need a 10 pound one once I lose all the weight, but 15 pounds is great for right now. But then DH called and told me he had decided to go clothes shopping for himself and how much he spent. WTF? (Pardon my language). So I got myself the blanket, and the neck pillow I wanted for the trip we are taking. I'm so frustrated at him. Me and the kids are going thrifting and he went to Kohl's to buy brand new clothes. But, remembering that I can't change him, only myself and how I respond to the things he does, I just told him his stuff was nice when he came home and showed it to me, and that he should take all his pants to the tailor so they don't drag the ground (he is short for a guy, but taller than me) and left the room.

And I got an email for 15% off a subscription box for bariatricpal (for those new to my blog, I had bariatric surgery over a year ago). It could not have come at a better time! I'm getting tired of my same ol' stuff, I need to add more ways of getting protein into my diet, but after my last few attempts at buying things that sounded good, I don't want to buy a whole box of something only to hate it. I checked out a lot of their older sub boxes (they keep a list of them that you can go and look at) and read reviews, and one where a person got one and tried everything in it and gave a review of each... I'm going to do it. I think I'll try the 3 month sub and see how that goes. It's almost $100, but you get $50 worth of product in every box, so that with 15% off, is a good deal, I think.

A dear friend on here is sending me her extra Living Well Planner (thank you SO much!!) so, while there is still a sale going on, I bought the stickers and daily/Weekly do-it stickies as well. They should get here by Monday, I can't wait! I watched a video on how to use each of these things, and think it will really work well for me, especially in conjunction with my Powersheets Goal Planner. May sound like a lot, but it really isn't, just put a few minutes aside each morning to work on it, and make it a habit. And really, spending that extra 10 minutes in the morning on scheduling and prioritizing makes the day go so much smoother, and more things that actually need to get done, done.

I've got a migraine going this morning, my injections take a few days to kick in, but it won't be long. Fortunately it is just the start of one, not a full blown one, and hopefully I can keep it to a dull roar.

Oh boy are we hitting the teenage years hard. I nicely try to wake my soon to be teen and end up having to use a very loud (what my husband calls my sergeant voice) voice to yell 'get up', to get her out of bed. For her birthday I'm getting her a nice old fashioned alarm clock, so that on week days she can get herself up. And if she does not, I will not feel bad about playing revelry as loud as I can to get her out of bed (hey, it motivated me to get out of bed in Basic, LOL!). That is another thing I'm upset with DH about. Every year I have the kids put together lists on Amazon of what they want. Well, he went and spent a lot on her (that could have waited since we have Prime and 2 day shipping) and I don't even know what he got her. So I don't know if he got her the stuff she put on there for fun, or the stuff she really wanted. So frustrating, and I'm going to tell him that tonight. I wanted to last night, but was just not feeling up to it. I feel like I was left out of the whole birthday process, and it made me feel very sad.

So, with that, and a fresh cup of coffee, I'm going to work on my morning routine of doing a 'brain dump' and then prioritizing what needs to be done for the day.

I hope you have a wonderful TGIF!!

~Flea
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • RREDFORD5
    :-) emoticon
    54 days ago
  • LITTLEGUYSMOM1
    Isn't GRACE one of the sweetest words? His mercy is new every morning. Praying that you are feeling better today. emoticon
    54 days ago
  • MDOWER1
    Good luck
    54 days ago
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