RELEASETHESTARS
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Look who the cat dragged in...

Saturday, June 22, 2019

WOW, I have been thinking about this website a lot in the past few days and decided to come and see if anyone was still here (if the website was even still here), so HI! emoticon

I love that absolutely nothing has changed here lol, even those emoticons.^ I've been reading back over my blogs and remembering a lot of you guys and also just remembering a lot of stuff about myself. It turns out my very first blog was almost exactly 10 years ago!! June 25th, today is June 22nd. The last time I was here was 1233 days or 3+ years ago. Not much has changed in my life since then, I've been in my apartment for 4 years now, I'm STILL a caregiver living paycheck to paycheck. A big difference is that I am in school now and on my 2nd semester, so at least I know I won't be working for peanuts forever. I'm so happy to finally be doing well in college, I've never been able to make that work before and I am just loving it.

As far as weight goes, when I checked out my page I saw that I had a weight tracker on there and I had gotten down to 315 pounds, oh those were the days! Now I have remained at around 380 for awhile now, my all time high was 442 which is all documented in my blogs from a few years ago. I'm glad I have a record of what I was thinking and feeling at various significant times over the last 10 years. I've always journal-ed on paper but I don't know, I write differently in the blogs, more light-hearted. Maybe I would like to continue writing here as I continue on in the journey of losing weight and improving my health.

So, That's about it. I don't have a lot of updates but I wanted to say hi. I DO miss the support on Spark, and I think I've been really missing it actually. It's not like I haven't been trying to get my weight loss back on track, I just haven't been able to stick with it. I think feeling like I'm in it alone hasn't been a great strategy for the past few years. Meaning, I have no one in my life to talk about this stuff with. I lead a pretty solitary life. The friends I had in the past, our lives went different directions, that stuff happens. And I've never had close relationships with family. These are just facts, I'm not trying to be a downer.

On a lighter note, I AM ready to get back into figuring this sh*t out, getting a game plan figured out, and getting the numbers going in the right direction again. Starting with small goals, my weight loss tracker on my page now is just from 380-345, and I'd love to get back to 345. A year ago I went to see Dwight Yoakam emoticon in concert and I was 350 pounds and felt a lot better than I do right now so, that's a good first goal for me.

Toodles for now!
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