Feeling sad and gross

After yesterday and today feeling down alone sad . I miss my late Dad in heaven . Want to sign up for a run but don’t want to publicize it . Looking for tha challenge setting on this . As far as health and the nutrition I can use help . The money it costs forvtherapu and dieitoon and all is so much , don’t want another fad , I wish my anxiety and depression and mental health issues and family issues relationships to to go away , anyhow , I know tomorrow when I weigh will be again more and my goal ... will not be met ... learning to do this for me with love and self care is hard , trusting the process and health care providers..having the knowledge and then thinking that what if because of my family history of health I will fail ... and who cares attitude plus stress from divorce and the loneliness... thanks for support all . Anyone that wants to join a virtual 10k or half marathon soon I need help ...