Tuesday, May 07, 2019
I log into spark each day, multiple times. I read over the posts, comment, like, read articles, and pose questions occasionally.
Though I have remained committed to my elimination food choices for months, I've grown lax with working out.
Today, I realize that this saddens me; on here, I read an article about perfectionism and the detrimental effects of this thought pattern during weightloss and it all made sense.
I've previously been praised for squeezing in workouts late at night or in between meetings but I don't workout daily. I don't set real goals. And because of this I have grown blah and complacent.
I typically look for a burst of energy or inspiration to challenge myself and push forward. But this time it's just a mental, "pick it up buttercup and move forward!".
We have this one life, in this body and time waits for no one.
So today as I review my zigzag, journey of weightloss, it is clear that I must be flexible in thought and abolish the perfectionist mindset as it does not serve me well. Perfectionism has me lying in bed as I ponder the multitude of possible ways to do something rather than just doing it.
As I've gotten older I have become way less of a 'firecraker' and more so much of an over thinker. I analyze the crap out of things and then am overwhelmed by each possible requirement/positive/negative potential. I used to have a thought, get up and do it, deal with the consequences later. Now I seem suspended in thought for days on end, scared to make 'the wrong' decision. Afraid of the potential consequences. Meanwhile time goes by and me not making decisions because I don't want to regret it later has lead me to regret wasting so much time--its a whole new set of regrets.
I've essentially put myself on a mental/life carasel forgetting how much I flipping love the bumper cars!
It feels great to get that off my chest. Note to self: You should really write more often:)