Lack of Balance = Crash
Monday, December 03, 2018
Balance is a concept I struggle with. I have a tendency to overload my time with responsibilities, and this especially true in service in my recovery lately.
I am carrying 5 service positions, and to be honest, it is simply too much for me. I am tired, physically, mentally, spiritually, emotionally. This past weekend was extremely stressful for me, and I feel out of balance in all ways.
I tried to talk to my sponsor, and her response (at the worst possible time, last night when I was literally in tears, I was so tired) was that I made these commitments. Well yeah, I did. I also did not anticipate there would be so much travel involved so closely together, or the time change, which means I have to drive in the dark (not a safe or good thing with my vision) since my travel partner has now resigned from his position.
So. My short term solution? I am going to walk. I am going to meditate. I am going to spend time with my kid. I will make meetings. I am going to work on eating healthier than I have been. What I'm not going to do? Focus on any of this mess (including typing reports) until I am more centered and more at peace. So that I don't say something I will regret, and so that I don't just quit until I've had some time to figure out what I want to do.
thanks for listening. I've been in tears from exhaustion the past two days, and I just needed to get this off my chest.