No title until I write what comes up

I have no idea what I will say here. I haven't had coffee or showered or taken out the dog. And yet I know this page is open to clear my brain fog and eyesight. The old pattern of turning to a fresh page to "clear the mechanism" of my mind ought to be remembered every now and then.

Aha!! My old internal junk closet of HABITUAL OLD "Go To" CHOICES

This is my topic!
Not that I am employing the cleanest set of new, what is best for the long run in the hear and now choices, but first: the slippery and smooth silkiness of what came "NATURALLY" aka automatically, like knee jerk and barely thought of first responses in my memory closet of programmed packages I once stored there!

We ALL have junk drawers and storage closets to some degree, where the "don't need but want to keep" thoughts are stored. So I clean out part of a place occasionally to look over what accumulated and maybe thin out some of the notions. But I'm always holding onto various "this and that".

Meanwhile, living in today, I wake wondering what New, Useful, Long Term Habit I want to cultivate, and often the old pattern of "Go To" familiarity is the very thing I grab instead. I don't meditate in stillness to let my best and highest choices to be visualized before springing into some kind of decision. I act before I am clear and darn, I have another moment of operating on an old automatic pilot. We all do it to get on with each day.

So here I supposedly spend all my energies trying to insert new habits into my psyche while the subliminal ease to slip into a pattern that is comfortable seduces me over and over again. AM I NOT DISCIPLINED enough? CLEAR enough? MOTIVATED enough? Spurts of progress and self pride ebb and flow as I pass through my life time left.

That's the first part of awareness. Because, in order to remember that I WANT to choose healthier habits that are not automatic, I must acknowledge how often I crave what is soothing and familiar instead. Otherwise, the "better choice" crosses my mind like a snapshot, only to be swept away by the tide of what flows!

I will brush my teeth, shower, feed the dog, walk the dog, and get into my day in right order. Old patterns may or may not include some of that, but in a stacked order that NO LONGER SERVES MY HIGHEST GOOD.

So there. Today's blog. Reorder my mind space to open up a higher, better order to what serves me. We can't float all our lives without simply drifting away...
The Passionate Tiger