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healthy habits. and jokes

Wednesday, November 21, 2018

Our Aspire & Inspire group asked us to write a blog post on how we create healthy habits.
Here are some tips to use :
1. make it 30 days -Three to four weeks is all the time you need to make a habit automatic
2. Make it Daily – Consistency is critical if you want to make a habit stick.
3. Start Simple – Don’t try to completely change your life in one day.
4. Remind Yourself –
5. Stay Consistent
6. Get a Buddy to do it with you
Jokes
What kind of music did the Pilgrims like? Plymouth Rock If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? Pilgrims Why can't you take a turkey to church? They use FOWL language. Why was the Thanksgiving soup so expensive? It had 24 carrots. What happened when the turkey got into a fight? He got the stuffing knocked out of him! What do you get when you cross a turkey with a banjo? A turkey that can pluck itself! When do you serve tofu turkey? Pranksgiving.

Asked to write a composition entitled, "What I'm thankful for on Thanksgiving,"
Little Johnny wrote, "I am thankful that I'm not a turkey."

Josh: Why did the farmer run a steamroller over his potato field on Thanksgiving Day?
Phil: Why?
Josh: He wanted to raise mashed potatoes

Biff: Why did the turkey cross the road?
Bob: I don’t know.
Biff: It was Thanksgiving Day, and he wanted people to think he was a chicken!

A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store for Thanksgiving Day, but couldn’t find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, “Do these turkeys get any bigger?”
“No, ma’am. They’re dead.”

A man buys a parrot, only to have it constantly insult him. He tries everything to make the parrot stop, but nothing works. Frustrated, the man puts the parrot in the freezer. After a few minutes the insults stop. The man thinks he might have killed the parrot, so he opens the freezer and takes the parrot out. The parrot is shivering. It stammers, “S-s-sorry for being r-r-rude. Please f-f-forgive me.” Then, after a moment, the parrot softly asks, “W-w-what exactly d-d-did the turkey do?”
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