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Waving goodbye to the wagon as it drives away

Thursday, November 01, 2018

Well, October sucked worse than a convention of thirsty vampires. I fell off the wagon so bad my “diet” ended up watching it drive away from the bottom of the ditch. If I could, I’d try to find a bright side...unfortunately, the only positive thing I can think of is that October is finally done and over with and it’s now November. I didn’t gain back *everything* that I worked so hard at getting rid of, but I’m still unhappy with gaining 6lbs. It isn’t even the numbers that are upsetting me so much right now. No, it’s the fact that I can *feel* my chubby tummy being chubbier than it was at the end of September and my clothes fitting a little tighter than is comfortable. I *was* planning on getting a haircut this weekend, but now I’m not so sure. I might withhold it and use it as a reward for when I lose the weight I gained back. Which means I’ll probably have to wait until next month. (Unless my weight gain is mostly water retention, in which case losing those 6lbs might go faster.) I wasn’t really all that surprised that October was kinda sucky. It really isn’t my favourite month. October and February are two of my least favourite times of the year. October because my Mom died October 16, 2014 and February because my Dad died February 15, 1992. In both cases I was at their bedside and holding their hands when the end came. In some ways my Dad’s death was the hardest because I was so much younger...only 17 at the time. On the other hand, I was very close to my Mom and I very much miss her (especially during canning season as that was kinda our thing to do together). Anyhoo...October is a stressful and sad time for me and I really could’ve coped better than reaching for the junk food. No matter which way I look at it, even if it’s “healthier” than potato chips, bingeing on Caramel and Chocolate Chip Rice Cakes is still bingeing. I know better than to try to “eat away my sorrows”; it’s never worked before so I have no idea why I thought this time would be any different. So, here’s to a new month with a new goal and renewed determination.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    You gotta love the fact that each day is a brand new shiny day one in which you can make better choices😊. I don’t make light of your October. Most people feel that hollowness in the pit of their stomachs, the one that is often mistaken for hunger. Stress and/or depression is often part of life, you can do this, I know it. Back to basics, one good choice at a time 💐. Know you do not walk this path alone
    758 days ago
  • SHINY5711
    I am so sorry you had a difficult month. Get your haircut! Find something else to reward yourself for getting back on track. Tuck October in your back pocket and move forward. You stumbled a bit. It happens. Dust yourself off and start moving forward again. We've got your back! emoticon emoticon
    760 days ago
  • TZAPP22
    Sending positive thoughts your way. Loss has a way of cutting our air supply making it difficult to function like we normally would. While you may have indulged more than you wanted to, you recognized it and that is huge. About the haircut, if it were me, I would do it anyway and this is my though process. You want the hair cut, it is time.. a new cut always makes us feel good about ourselves.. if you do not get it cut and wait until you lose the weight, it may become something that causes negative thoughts thus making your ability to drop those pounds more difficult. It's a brand new month, you said it yourself, set yourself up to win by feeling good about yourself! Good luck! You can do this..
    765 days ago
    But that was yesterday and yesterday is gone!

    Keep on Keeping on!

    Make today the greatest day of your life!
    Until tomorrow!

    “Beginning today, treat everyone you meet as if they were going to be dead by midnight. Extend to them all the care, kindness and understanding you can muster, and do so with no thought of any reward. Your life will never be the same again.”
    ~Og Mandino
    765 days ago
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