Friday, October 26, 2018
I have been doing some of this myself, and I see myself doing it, and I have been considering why, and how to move past it. I do NOT want to go back to where I once was with my weight and eating habits, and it’s such a slippery slope. So what are some of the basic premises that I know to be true in my heart and head, but that I am ignoring in favor of feeding my anxiety, fear, stress...?
Firstly, all my behaviors, or actions, thoughts, and emotions have a cause. I may not be conscious of what that cause is in the moment, but there IS a cause. I am not acting purely habitually and independent of causation. This is important, because if I can identify the cause, then I have a chance to solve the problem or at least address the cause, such that I no longer feel the need to feed it comfort food to appease the discomfort it is causing me physically and emotionally.
Second, Figuring out the causes of my actions, thoughts, and emotions works better than judging or blaming (myself, others, events). The victim mentality is an attractive trap, but it is definitely not a healthy place to stay for long. Yes, awful things have happened in my life. Yes, the memories can be overwhelming. Yes, I have chronic medical conditions, and sometimes the pain and discomfort are severe (by my standards). But my perspective is that everybody faces the bad stuff at some point in our lives. Some of us live with it daily. Some of us have sudden events occur (sometimes repeatedly!) that prompt emotional eating for a time. I figure it’s part of the cyclical nature of living this wondrous and mysterious situation of life.
It’s whether or not I get stuck there that matters to me. I don’t like being stuck anywhere! (Might be my claustrophobia!? lol). Blaming others, or circumstances is a sure way for me to get stuck and stay stuck. I have been there and done that... and had the 3X shirt to prove it! I have to make the decision to stop though. No one could make me 8 years ago, just as no one outside of me can “make me” change my behaviors now. I will change what I am going to change when I am going to change it. Sure others can encourage and support me... but until something clicked in my head 8 years ago that prompted the initial desire to change... or clicks in my head now and stops this small ride down that slippery slope.., I am not going to see effective, lasting results.
Lastly, the healthier behaviors that I DO want to perpetuate...? Have to be practiced in context. I cannot just spout off here about how this could work, or that could work. I have to create a feasible (for me that means simple) plan, and implement the plan in real life, and tweak the plan as necessary to fit my real life circumstances. Life is not static! (At least mine isn’t, or anyone else I know.). Things change constantly and the plan (both food and exercise) has to be flexible enough to accommodate the changes.
Currently, I need to re-reevaluate my short term, midterm, and long term goals ( in other words all of my goals) to see where I have become inflexible, or what has become either unfeasible or is simply no longer relevant to my situation. I am thinking about going back to the beginning and looking at the simplest of goals, and giving myself the morale boost of achievement. Each small success leads to another success, which leads to greater successes! I know this.., I just have to give myself achievable short term goals that give me that sense of success...
I think if I simplify things I will probably be able to drag myself out of this emotional eating slump I seem to be in at the moment. I have to find the cause for it first, so I can move beyond it.., and succeed at my plan. Because, even if I created a simple plan, with achievable goals, if I leave the cause of the emotional distress hanging in place then my chances of real success are substantially decreased. And I want to maximize my chances! It has worked for me before when I had bigger hills to climb. This is only a minor blip, but best to catch it now.