why and why not
Wednesday, September 26, 2018
I have spent a lot of time reflecting on why I want to loose weight. There is the health reasons, the fitness reasons, the social reasons and the personal reasons. I bet I thought of dozens of reasons.
After thinking about why this path is important I thought about the reasons to not do this. And do you know what I came up with. The only reason was "fear". Fear is completely debilitating and huge to me because if is such a strong emotion. Fear that people will acknowledge my weight issue. Fear of failing to succeed. Fear that it isn't enough.fear that my anxiety and panic attacks will start again if I fail. Fear of disappointing people. Fear of being made fun of at the gym. Fear of anyone finding out how bad of shape I let myself get in. Heck I am even afraid to go to the physician because of what she will say to me about my weight.
Today I am choosing not to live in fear. I am going to face this process head on. If it works great....if it doesn't then I think I need to see the encrinologist again. I really cant continue to not look after myself. It just makes sense to keep trying.