QUEENOTHEFOREST
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Hello old friends

Sunday, September 16, 2018

9 months since the last time I really used all my Spark tools? Wow. How did that happen? I still consider myself a Sparkie. Cogito, ergo sum. I think, therefore I am. Spark is my go-to life style. And I use many of my Beck cognitive tools in most aspects of my life.

So, I am roaring back into the thick of things. And the first thing I discovered is that there is going to be Beck Pink group reading starting October 1. Perfect timing for me. I’m in. What luck.

I have not spent the last 9 months sitting on the sofa eating bonbons. I have been working hard on grass roots political action. I am still at it. And I have a sense of satisfaction that no matter what the outcome I have done what I am capable of doing. That is a very good thing. I’m not done either. But that is a different blog for a different website and it has only a little bit to do with being a dedicated Sparkie. Good work and a sense of purpose are a part of well-being. An important part. That part of my life is on track.

Right now, my biggest challenges, no make that down fall, are physical pain and sugar addiction. Two years ago, I had an ankle injury. I could not walk my usual 5 miles a day. And I “comforted myself” with sugar again. I have struggled with sugar for more than 30 years. I injured the other ankle last April. Ugh. And I drowned my sorrows in pints of ice cream. This time physical therapy does not seem to be helping. I don’t like pain. Grrrrrr. My world became a dark and dreary place.

I guess it is no coincidence that I quit my evil sugar poison last week and today my mental fitness is improving. Enough that I really want to be back into Beck again and I intend to use the log and trackers as they are intended to be used. I am suddenly not feeling at all sorry for myself. And I truly believe that if I keep at it my ankle will improve. It just will. Not only that, I suddenly remember that I like tracking and logging and that I enjoy using cognitive behavioral tools. The only difference between today and a week ago is that I have not eaten refined sugar. It feels like a heavy cloud has opened up to let sunlight in. I feel like two entirely different people. I think like two entirely different people.

The bad news crazy thing about me is that I have done this hundreds of times over my lifetime. Or maybe the great happy thing is that I have quit the stuff hundreds of times over my lifetime. Today is one of the happy times.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • VALERIEMAHA
    From one long-lost Sparker to another -- HEY!

    And SO agreeing with Ellen, "Well, ya know, I'm not so sure that political activism 'has only a little bit to do with being a dedicated Sparkie because indeed. 'good work and a sense of purpose are a part of well-being.'
    emoticon
    Maha

    9 hours ago
  • BARBARAJ73
    emoticon It brightened my day to see an email in my inbox announcing that you had written a new blog !! Glad you're back. As others have said in a variety of ways, it doesn't matter how many times we start over - just that we do. Good for you! emoticon
    21 hours ago
  • CATE195
    emoticon You've returned! emoticon
    1 day ago
  • CAPECODDIN
    Glad to see you back! Can't remember that Chinese proverb but it's something like fall down 10 times get up 11 times or something like that... lol
    1 day ago
  • CANTSTAYAWAY
    Sugar, my drug of choice has lured me off the wagon too many times, but I am here to start again! I really enjoyed your blog, and in spite of sorrows needing drowning, there is lots of positive wisdom here!
    2 days ago
  • KRISZTA11
    emoticon
    I'm so glad you are back, and that you join the pink book reading!
    emoticon

    It is amazing what a difference refraining from refined sugars can make in mood and energy levels.
    emoticon
    2 days ago
  • PHOENIX1949
    emoticon

    2 days ago
  • GEORGE815
    Welcome back. Have a great week.
    2 days ago
  • 1DAY-ATA-TIME
    Welcome back. Like you, I fell of the wagon, sort of speak, stop Sparking for reasons I cannot remember. It took me a couple of years before I returned. But now I here to stay. Health and wellness is a life long journey. I wish you the best.
    2 days ago
  • WATERMELLEN
    Well, ya know, I'm not so sure that political activism "has only a little bit to do with being a dedicated Sparkie" because indeed. "good work and a sense of purpose are a part of well-being".

    And maybe as much as stopping the sugar gave you the impetus you want and need -- when you've done everything you can then you can be contented, and now you're doing everything you can with respect to the nutrition and ankle issues too.

    Yay you.

    Welcome back.

    Glad you're feeling happy!! emoticon
    2 days ago
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