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I'm Not Ready For This

Wednesday, September 12, 2018

I should have known last winter by the fact that I only wore a coat of any kind when I needed to put fuel in my vehicle that something was amiss. And I didn't realize that it could even get any worse than that either.

Ha! Was I wrong!

It started slowly. The foggy mind. Forgetting things. Not remembering the little things. Then the night sweats and not sleeping really well. Yeah, it was all starting to happen.

But no one prepared me for what was about to happen.

It seemed to happen all at once. And come out of nowhere. Suddenly the gates of "hell" were opened and I was placed firmly in the center of the furnace. I could be sitting in a freezer and still be dripping wet with sweat. Oh, and the stench? I was starting to smell like an old sweat sock that had been left in a ten year old's gym bag for a week. And that was two hours after I took a shower and put deodorant on. And I'm not fond of the fact that I've reverted back to my 13th birthday look of greasy locks and pimply skin.

But the thing that has thrown me for a loop is the mood. Being bipolar has prepared me for mood swings, but nothing like this. The past few weeks have suddenly left me on guard to the fact that I might need bail and an alibi before this is all done and over.

But the good news is that I did become pro-active and visit my doctor this morning. They did take blood to test to see if I'm really in menopause and to see if I qualify for hormone replacement therapy. I need something, because I'm really chaotic right now.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Love the descriptive way you told about menopause. Had to laugh and enjoyed the blog. Call me if you need bail! Hope your doctor is helpful. emoticon
    493 days ago
    493 days ago
  • JUSTME29
    I hope your doctor is able to help. I don't have money to give you for bail, but we can work on an alibi...
    494 days ago
    This to shall pass!!! It is a problem but you need to find other routines to help you survive these moments. The night sweats are the worse!! Good for going to the doctor and just hang in there! emoticon emoticon
    494 days ago
    Walks and yoga help me. It's good that you talked to your doctor....I did the same.
    Menopause is horrible..some days are harder then others....just remember you are not alone emoticon
    494 days ago
  • CATE195
    I am on the other side of menopause, but I remember well. In fact I still have occasional night sweats and also a night here and there when I just cannot sleep. Some things that have worked for me for sleep are"
    shut down computer by 4 PM
    a routine including a bit of yoga, at bedtime
    reading before I go to sleep

    Wish there was a magic pill to make it all go away, but I think it's one of those things that you have to muddle your way through. Glad you went to see the doctor.
    494 days ago
    hope you can get it regulate as much as possible. I understand exercise may help.
    494 days ago
  • MARYBETH4884
    emoticon you will come through this! I hope your doctor has fast acting solutions that help you feel yourself again.
    494 days ago
    I remember all that fun. My doctor put me on hormone replacement and I stopped being homicidal. My pills were wonderful. Waiting for about 20 years to go through the hot flashes really meant that they weren't that bad.
    494 days ago
    494 days ago
    Hang in there. I'm glad you went to the doctor today. Hopefully, they'll have some answers and relief.

    494 days ago
    I'm so scared for my time. I'm 38, so it's coming sooner or later. I'm also bipolar, so I'm really curious about how it will affect my disorder. I also have endometriosis, which may or may not play into it. Anyway, good luck!!!! I'm rooting for you 😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁
    494 days ago
    I am also bipolar and menopause is wrecking havoc with my mood as well. Today was especially hard. I laughed so hard I snorted my tea when I read about needing bail and an alibi. Thank you. I needed that. I hope tomorrow is easier for us both.
    494 days ago
    494 days ago
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