Still waiting on a couple results
Friday, August 24, 2018
Still waiting on 2 tests to come back, but so far all the big nasties they have tested me for have come back negative. I am happy about that on one hand, but they still have the 2 tests to come back... and I am still sick... sooo, I was referred to a GI specialist ( referred by my rheumatologist, by the way... who thinks the referral should have been made a while ago!). In fact my rheumatologist is not impressed either with the care that I am receiving from my primary care doctor or that I got when I went to the ER at the local hospital on the 9th... she says that I have been too sick for too long... that something more should have been done long before this... I don’t know... I am just so exhausted of being sick...
And the drama with my friend continues... I need to rethink how much I interact with this person, because they just make me feel badly about myself in the end. I don’t need that on a daily basis. Harrumph.
On an interesting side note, I have been having an interesting conversation about language and the use of language in self identity. There is a difference between saying “I am schizophrenic” and saying “I have schizophrenia”. It is a small word choice difference, but the emotional impact on self identity can be huge... I can be sick, without taking on my illness as an integral part of my identity. For many of us with mental health diagnoses, other chronic illnesses or long term disabilities, our identity becomes so wrapped up in the disability or health condition that we forget all the other fun, interesting, challenging, diverse, aspects of ourselves! And that is limiting and sad... for anyone. And really the effects are felt by anyone who loves or cares about someone with one of these things as well... I equate severe physical, mental, emotional illness or pain to ripples in a pond or lake... they don’t stop just at the person ... the point of impact as it were... the effects are felt in spreading waves in circles around the person , to their friends, family, health care providers, and the families of those people as well. Because we do not live in isolation (much as I would like to at times), we are by nature social creatures and our experiences affect how we interact with our families, even when we try to compartmentalize. Eh, I am on my soapbox again... I will get off that box now... have a good day!