Tuesday Here I Come!
Tuesday, August 14, 2018
My PTSD is acting up, and this morning I had really bad panic attack and anxiety, recovering was difficult. So while I was waiting for time to wake my DD for school I sat in my chair and tried to journal. Hope keyed into how bad I was feeling and asked to get in my lap (she puts her front paws on my lap and stares at me) So I spent that time just petting and loving on her instead. Every time I tried to think about it and journal about it my anxiety went up and she would paw at my hands and sit on my arms to keep me from journaling about it. In the picture she is trying to get me to put the phone down, even though I was just taking a picture. She is such a good girl! I can't wait to tell the trainer today!
Got my shot in my knee. The ortho doc is positive it won't work and is just so upset with insurance. But they said I had to try it first before I could do the shots the Ortho doc wants to do. Ow. It's a very long needle and feels really weird.
I'm sipping on some "mountain climber's high" chai and loving it, it is so soothing, I wish it didn't have caffeine in it or I would have it all of the time. But I have decided to switch from coffee to chai in the mornings, it does not have as much caffeine as coffee, so is better for me. I will only have coffee on days I go to my therapist when I go to Starbucks, and we are too broke for that right now, so I'll just bring some chai with me.
Both kiddos are home today, one with anxiety and one sick. I'm sad to say I think the anxiety gene passed from me to YDD. But she is wonderful and wants to learn ways to cope and stay in school so that she will learn how to deal with people so when she gets a job when she is older she can cope well. Her words, not mine. So proud of her. But a lot of stuff happened with teasing and a teacher yelling at her in front of the whole class, yeah, we are talking to the teacher about that, but that is all anxiety inducing stuff.
I just want to get my anxiety and PTSD down to manageable levels again so I can keep moving forward!