LESLIELENORE
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Putting things in perspective...

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Friday, July 27, 2018

There are times when I am stressed and struggling (and yes, I still sometimes struggle with my relationship with food even after a number of years in maintenance), that I need to put things back in perspective and remember how far I have come. When I joined SparkPeople in May of 2011, I was morbidly obese, basically homebound and so very sick (and over medicated)... I was later informed by a visiting nurse that she hadn’t expected me to live much more than another year or two... if that. I thought that that was my fate, all there was for me. But I was wrong. It started with walking... a quarter of the way around the block, then halfway, then all the way around the block. Then twice around. And then I caught the walking bug... and adopted the Cooper-dog! It took me almost 2 hours to walk my first 5k, but I finished. And the food issues? Eh, I still struggle with that. I have reactive hypoglycemia, so my relationship with food and its effect on my body can be complicated. Sometimes I am rebellious and say “f” it, and eat whatever I want... and suffer the consequences... and then I say that it’s not worth the price of suffering... until the next time. I don’t usually go hog wild, they are really mild rebellions, and the consequences far outweigh the enjoyment, but every single time I have the irrational thinking that THIS time it will be better. lol... I guess I am hard headed and lack a sense of historical fact. So, my casual posts about going out for a two hour walk with the Cooper-dog...? That would have been impossible before. These middle of the night cardio workouts where I pull a 14 or 15 minute/mile pace for an hour or more...? That would have been impossible before. Much less the runs I add in when I want to challenge myself! Sure, I have health issues now that have surfaced in the past couple of years, but I am still light years ahead of where and what I was in 2011. I may moan and whinge and complain about this symptom or that, or this side effect, etc... but underneath it all I always know... if I hadn’t made the change, adopted a healthier lifestyle (including losing the weight), and challenged myself, I would be much worse off, if not dead already. That is a sobering thought and strangely an uplifting one as well. I managed to beat the odds this far (pulmonary embolism, stroke, chronic illnesses and pain)... I am betting I keep on beating the odds... because I am stubborn like that, and I have all of you supporting me and helping to hold me accountable. I have another day because of the choices I made yesterday (and the choice I made over 7 years ago to join SparkPeople)... every day I get to make that choice again. What will be YOUR choice today?
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