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New Streak - Day 0 - Intentional reset

Sunday, July 08, 2018

So...I got to day three. Yesterday was kind of awesome. It was my oldest girl's birthday, and the whole family got together for a trip to Lake Tobias Animal Preserve. Lots of walking, and wonderful time with my DW and our girls (we have three adult daughters). It was successful in every measure.

This morning was something of a mental crisis. Not in the sense that something awful happened. Just that I have been confronted with a series of questions that required answers. I have been challenged to define my weight loss goals in terms of my core beliefs. In another setting, the key question of 'why' I want to be more fit was posed. In a third setting, the question was simply posed 'Who are you?'

Now, I like to think of myself as reasonably self-aware, I concur with Plato who said that an unexamined life is not worth living. Now, I haven't had any big break-throughs to motivate my life (the actual purpose of the exercise in all three settings), but I have come to a better understanding barriers to success that I have imposed upon myself. I have reached a stage in life where others see me as an authority. At work or at church, my advice and knowledge are often sought out. But, when I look in a mirror, I don't see someone who deserves that authority. That isn't as debilitating a thing as it might sound. It isn't that I don't act upon the authority that I have earned. It's just that I don't feel like I deserve it.

Well, maybe I have just come to that conclusion the day started me toward. I want to see myself with the same level of confidence and authority that others have for me. And, frankly, I sometimes have opportunity to speak in public, and am generally glad there are no cameras.

Does that count as a 'down to the core' motivation for reaching a healthy lifestyle. I think maybe not, in the long run. But, it's satisfactory for today, and answers all three of my tormentors. Tomorrow, new streak, Day 1.
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