CROUCHINGFLEA
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Tuesday, July 03, 2018

So I just wrote a blog entry titled "Healing." I got to thinking about it and I need to find ways to 'spark' myself daily to keep the motivation and excitement going. Not exercising today was totally understandable to me, I was so drained I don't think I could have done much. But once I get my puppy, Hope.... I can't have a down day where I don't take her for a walk or to the park and exercise her. Hope will depend on me to play with her and get her in excellent shape and all that jazz. I think just having Hope will help 'spark' me on.

So I'm trying to think of things that spark me to keep going and do better and try harder.

emoticon One is what the doctor said, that I won't have much more of a life span if I don't lose the weight. I want to live to see my kids married and have kids. I want to enjoy getting old with DH and being silly in our old age.

emoticon I want to feel better. I always feel like crap and was taking naps and just didn't have the energy to do anything. I've gained some energy from working out and losing the 36 pounds, but I know more will come as I do more and lose more

emoticon Come Thanksgiving I want to wow the Aunts and Grandma with how much I've lost. That is 5 more months. I can lose a lot of weight in that time if I just stick to it. Stop the emotional eating and stick to what I can eat. Right now I'm supposed to be fasting.

emoticon I want to get off that darned cpap machine! I really dislike sleeping with it and want to be able to snuggle into my pillow like I used to.

emoticon I have a hernia that needs to be taken out but the surgeon won't take it out till I've lost a lot more weight than I have now. Try 60 more pounds. I can do it though, I know if I push and really get into this I can do it!

emoticon I want to be in good enough shape to go hiking, really hiking. Eventually an overnight hike with my sweet hubby. Then my BFF wants to do one as well, once I'm in shape enough. She's not in shape enough. The rolling hills where I grew up that she hikes are nothing compared to the foothills we live in here in GA, lol.

emoticon I want to finally, after all these years, meet my goal. I want to prove I can do it. I want to feel like me again, not the pillsbury dough boy.

emoticon I want to look in the mirror and be happy with what I see. I don't like how I look now, even though I can see improvements, I should let those improvements spark me on!!

emoticon Slow and steady may win the race, but my slow is faster than most because of the gastric bypass surgery. I only have one chance at this rapid weight loss and I need to take advantage of it. That alone should spark me to get off my bum and get moving. Hmm. Maybe I will work out tonight.

emoticon I need to back off of a few teams, I'm spending too much time on the computer, but I love connecting with my friends on SP, it sparks me to do better and to keep going. Especially the success stories

emoticon I want to be able to do so many things again. Like cross my legs. Yes, that will be nice. See my toes without bending over. Sit with my legs together, not pushed apart by fat. Cross my arms across my chest without it looking like I'm making a pillow to rest my head on from it being so high.

Things to look forward to:
DH has promised me skin surgery and a breast reduction and lift once I lose all the weight. If that doesn't spark my motivation, I don't know what will! I know for the skin surgery you have to have maintained within a certain range for 6 months to a year before they will do it. So I think the breast surgery is the one I will have first.

I have so many reasons to keep my Spark going, how could I have let it wane? I'll transfer this list to a place where I can see it often and remember that though I have bad days and emotional and mental hard times, I can still bounce back, plus there are always dogs. LOL

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