jokes and yoga
Friday, June 22, 2018
This is our assignment for the Aspire and Inspire sparkteam:
June 21 is International Yoga Day. Have you ever tried yoga? I took a yoga class at my nephew wedding. Also I done yoga with youtube video. Also I
done yoga on the wii. Which type of yoga do you prefer if you are yogini (a female master yoga practitioner)? I am definitely not a yogini .
It was her first night at her diet meeting and Sue was feeling a little nervous. To help her feel at ease the other members began a discussion about the foods they most wanted to buy as they went round the supermarket. One man confessed that French cheeses were his greatest weakness and a rather large woman said she found it almost impossible to resist anything smothered in chocolate.
Finally it was Sue’s turn to admit her cravings. Taking a deep breath, she confided, "To be honest I can’t resist anything in aisles three, four, five, six or nine."
A diet limerick
Bathroom scale diet tricks
1. Weigh yourself fully clothed after dinner and again the next morning without clothes and before breakfast, because it's nice to see how much weight you've lost overnight!
2. Never weigh yourself with wet hair.
3. When weighing, remove everything, including eyeglasses. In this case, blurred vision is an asset. Don't forget to remove jewelry as it could weigh as much as a pound!
4. Buy only cheap scales, never the medical kind. Accuracy is the enemy and high quality scales are very accurate.
5. Always go to the bathroom first.
6. Weigh yourself after a haircut, this is good for up to half a pound of hair (hopefully).
7. Exhale with all your might BEFORE stepping onto the scale. (Air has weight, right?)
8. Start out with just one foot on the scale, then holding onto a towel rod slowly edge your other foot onto the scale while slowly releasing the towel rod. Admittedly, this takes time, but it's worth it. You will weigh at least two pounds less than if you'd stepped onto the scale normally.
A Great Diet Tip
A great way to lose weight is to eat while you are naked and standing in front of a mirror. Restaurants will almost always throw you out before you can eat too much.
To achieve great things we must live as though we were never going to die.
• Welcome every morning with a smile. Look on the new day as another special gift from your Creator, another golden opportunity to complete what you were unable to finish yesterday. Be a self-starter...