The goal... easygoing, without being a pushover
Saturday, June 02, 2018
I was going to wait to blog again until tomorrow, but... my mind is going full speed , so I need to say what is there to be said. So, I wrote one blog on the harm caused by being “nice” all the time, demonstrating a lack and trust in other people’s reactions by never challenging them. And then I wrote one on the difference between being brutally honest and speaking your truth out of love, as well as the cultural necessity of white lies (I don’t think I fully explained my theory, but in my defense, I think I wrote that one at about 1am)... in the end always being “nice” or resorting to white lies to avoid having to explain (yet again) something that is an integral part of your (my) existence is tiring (in a friend’s words “exhausting”)... the ideal would be to in a situation(s) where I can be easygoing, and yet be assertive enough not to be a pushover without having to explain myself over and over. I don’t currently have this in my life, even with friends and family. I am constantly explaining myself. But now that I think about it, I am not certain whether that is my anxiety and feelings of uncertainty about everything, or an actual need to explain... hmmm... maybe I should try an experiment and wait until they ask?
It is hard to relinquish control over certain things when so many things are out of my control. But I know when I let things go and let them just be that things go easier for everyone.
The photo is from my dad’s house... that’s the walk down his driveway to get the newspapers (or the mail) though the boxes aren’t visible yet in the picture... my dad is my example of being easygoing without being a pushover... now I just need to emulate him more.