60,000-79,999 SparkPoints 71,545

There's Something Happening Here

Thursday, May 17, 2018

There is something happening. I am changing. I fell into a vat of acceptance in my life and just let the status quo be good enough. The status quo has been me barely getting around, walking with a cane most of the time, limiting where I go. Not saying yes to things because I do not know if there will be seating, or seating that can hold me. I am uncomfortable in my own skin, and I want to change that.

I am not living; I am just existing.

I need to be a part of the world I have been born into. I am a person that people generally enjoy being around. I am often funny, kind and generous - and none of these things are apparent when I give up and sit in the corner or in my office, because I am afraid to care, afraid to try something different, afraid to be who I really am because I might fail.

Not trying has made me fail. I realize that my journey to health is taking a lot of twists and turns. It is a long road, and I am not throwing in the towel. I let my circumstances overwhelm me and it may seem like I gave up - but the truth is, I was just on hiatus. - I am now re-evaluating who I want to be --- and give myself the chance to show my best self to the world. I am done with just existing. I owe it to myself to be the best version of me.

I am going to blog more, get an activity tracker, make intentional movement, be a more engaged human, and remember just how special I am and what a miracle my life is. This is my time to be all that i can, and in the way that I want to do it.

Cheers to us all for trying and being all that we can. Let's love ourselves a little more and get down to it.
Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • 1965KAREN
    I love your honesty! This could have been something that I would write. I'm digging in too! Welcome back!!
    181 days ago
    Such great replies from people who know what each day is like. You inspire and give hope you always have :)
    Lots of hugs.
    185 days ago
    Your story is similar to mine.. I am glad you are back..we can do this...one day at a time
    185 days ago
    I took the challenge when I learn about my heart problem. How will you meet the challenge?
    185 days ago
    I am not living; I am just existing. That sound like me. I am so glad to hear that you are actively changing that. Here's to you and making changes to go out there and really LIVE!
    185 days ago
    I have been there so many times. Keep trying and you will start to see progress. I am in "Team 300+ Plus" and have found great support on the team thread "52 2018 Weigh In". Good luck on your journey.
    185 days ago
    I am so glad to see you back!
    The rawness of this blog touches my heart, and also speaks for me.
    I have done the same thing with my own life.
    I too am trying to rejoin the world, not waste this life I have been blessed with.
    Love you Mar!!! emoticon emoticon emoticon
    185 days ago
    Great to hear from you! I am still hanging in!
    185 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment

    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

More Blogs by MICKEYMAX