jokes and April review and May goals
Tuesday, May 08, 2018
This is our assignment for the Aspire and Inspire sparkteam:
1 Eat less CRAP - did thisC-CARBONATED DRINKS - need to work on this
R-REFINED SUGAR - did this
A- ARTIFICIAL SWEETENERS & COLOR - did this
P- PROCESSED FOODS - working on this
2 EAT MORE FOOD:
F- FRUITS & VEGGIES -try to eat 3 different freggie a day = did good with this
O- ORGANIC LEAN PROTEIND- did good with this
0-O- OMEGA 3 FATTY ACIDIS- did good with this
D-DRINK WATER - need to work on thia
3. focus on my ASPIRE & INSPIRE team - did this
4. 5. A commitment to keep my 10+ fitness minutes streak going -on my 334 day
6. lose weight I gain i now weigh 170.4
7. strength training 2x a week and one day of flexibility and 2x cardio I forgot about this did mainly cardio
1 Eat less CRAP -
C-CARBONATED DRINKS -
R-REFINED SUGAR -
A- ARTIFICIAL SWEETENERS & COLOR -
P- PROCESED FOODS
2 EAT MORE FOOD:
F- FRUITS & VEGGIES -try to eat 3 different freggie a day
O- ORGANIC LEAN PROTEIND-
0-O- OMEGA 3 FATTY ACIDIS-
D-DRINK WATER -
3. focus on my ASPIRE & INSPIRE team -
4. focus on my SPICY SPARKOLOGISTS blc35 team
5. focus on my 5% team
6. A commitment to keep my 10+ fitness minutes streak going -
7. lose weight I now weight 170.4
EVER WONDER Why??
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why you don't ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why "abbreviated" is such a long word?
Why doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why you have to click on "Start" to stop Windows 98?
Why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor, while dishwashing
liquid is made with real lemons?
Why the man Who invests all your money is called a broker?
Why there isn't mouse-flavored cat food?
Who tastes dog food when it has a "new & improved" flavor?
Why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
Why they don't make the Whole plane out of the material used for the indestructible black box ?
Why sheep don't shrink when it rains?
Why they are called apartments when they are all stuck together?
if con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
Why they call the airport "the terminal" if flying is so safe?
FUNNY ONE LINE JOKES:I hope
What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?
The fight we had last night was my fault,
my wife asked me what was on the TV and i said dust.
Boys are like parking spaces the good ones are take-already!!!!
They call our language the mother tongue because the father seldom gets to speak.
When I told the doctor about my loss of memory, he made me pay in advance.
Where did you get those big eyes?
They came with the face.
It was love at first sight. Then I took a second look.
A modern artist is one who throws paint on canvas, wipes it off with a cloth and sells the cloth.
"Has there been any insanity in your family?"
"Yes, doctor. My husband thinks he's the boss."
I was thinking of becoming a doctor. I have the handwriting for it.
We have a quiet home life. I don't speak to her and she doesn't speak to me.
The quickest way to make tossed salad is to give fresh vegetables to an 18-month-old child.
"What do use for washing dishes?"
"Oh, I tried many things but found my husband best."
"How is your wife getting along on her reducing diet?"
"Fine. She vanished last night."
"Why don't you give your husband a divorce?"
"What, I have lived with him for ten years and now I should make him happy?"
My wife is always talking about a trip to Europe.
I have no objections - I let her talk.
There's one thing good about being poor - its inexpensive.