jokes and stress
Monday, April 23, 2018
This is our assignment for the Aspire and Inspire sparkteam: April is Stress Awareness Month. We all have stress in our lives and it’s important to find useful ways to relieve it. Describe 5 or more positive ways you can respond to the stress in your life and keep your own stress levels in check.
1. Get More Laughter in Your Life-the physical act of laughing releases tension and brings positive physiological changes.
2.exercise - whether it tai chi or aerobic can lower stress
3. Use Journaling - journaling can get your feeling out and
can lower your stress level
4. Play Games -Enjoying a good game with a group of friends, or playing something relaxing online can take your mind off of your stressors, and can lead to a more relaxed state.
5. Pray-Many people turn to spirituality for stress relief, and studies show it works.
your jokes funny I hope
The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, "You know, I've lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?"
"Because every time I talk to a a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere."
The New Guy
A shopper asked a store clerk if she could buy half a grapefruit. Not knowing what to do, he excused himself to ask the manager.
"Some nut out there wants to buy half a grapefruit..." he began, and, suddenly realizing that the customer had entered the office behind him, continued, "... and this lovely lady would like to buy the other half."
The manager was impressed with the way the clerk amicably resolved the problem and they later started chatting. "Where are you from?" asked the store manager.
"Lancaster, Pennsylvania," replied the clerk, "home of ugly women and great hockey teams."
"Oh, my WIFE is from Lancaster," challenged the manager.
Without skipping a beat, the clerk asked, "What team was she on?"
Grocery Shopping Joke
In the frozen foods department. of a grocery store, a man and his son were shopping. As the man checked something off his shopping list, he was overheard to whisper to his son, "If we mess this up, your mother won't ever ask us to do it again."
A man observed a woman in the grocery store with a three year old girl in her basket. As they passed the cookie section, the child asked for cookies and her mother told her "no." The little girl immediately began to whine and fuss, and the mother said quietly, "Now Ellen, we just have half of the aisles left to go through; don't be upset. It won't be long."
He passed the Mother again in the candy aisle. Of course, the little girl began to shout for candy. When she was told she couldn't have any, she began to cry. The mother said, "There, there, Ellen, don't cry. Only two more aisles to go, and then we'll be checking out."
The man again happened to be behind the pair at the check-out, where the little girl immediately began to clamor for gum and burst into a terrible tantrum upon discovering there would be no gum purchased today. The mother patiently said, "Ellen, we'll be through this check out stand in five minutes, and then you can go home and have a nice nap."
The man followed them out to the parking lot and stopped the woman to compliment her. "I couldn't help noticing how patient you were with little Ellen..."
The mother broke in, "My little girl's name is Tammy... I'm Ellen."