Day 2 - Why Am I Eating So Much?!
Tuesday, April 17, 2018
Recap of Yesterday:
I fought all day to stay focused and finish my checklist for the day. For the most part, I succeeded. At the gym, I ran/walked a VERY slow 2+ miles. Two weeks off is NOT good for training and fighting off the rest of this sinus infection doesn't help at all. One thing I did notice was that I felt hungry ALL DAY. So much so that I started jotting down how often I was eating.
7am - a little sausage biscuit
9:30am - I was hungry again and ate the inside (basically the pepperoni) from a pepperoni roll that was leftover
11:30am - I wanted lunch - homemade chicken salad with 6 club crackers
1:30pm - I was hungry AGAIN and reached for a protein Kind bar
3:10pm - WTF body?! I ate my snack I intended for after the gym
And then after the gym, I wasn't hungry. HUH?! I drank a protein shake on my way home and didn't feel the need to eat until dinner time with my boys.
8:15pm - 1/2 of a homemade Cuban sandwich (plus a couple extra bites) and a few chips
Now the 10pm cookie raid was NOT on the list. I wasn't happy about it. Pretty sure that was leftover stress eating from this past week.
Part of me wants to be mad at myself. I used to be so much better at feeling fuller in between meals. I'm not hardcore training yet so I don't think that has anything to do with it. But it wasn't mindless stress eating. It was a conscious
"I feel hungry."
"Drink some water and see if it passes."
"It didn't pass."
"Maybe I need to eat something. I can't stop thinking about eating something."
"Well at least find something good to eat. Eat protein. Maybe that will help."
"See, good choice! Protein! Should hold you over for a bit."
2 Hours Later - "I'm hungry AGAIN?! WAAAAAHHH!!"
So, other than the cookies (UGH! Damn my kid for talking me into letting those in the house! *lol*), I can't really be MAD at myself. Well, I am. And I'm not. I'm trying to do that thing I said about forgiving myself. I'm telling myself to just listen to my body and see how this works out. I put my calories in MFP and it's not bad. Right on track really for calories, if not a little off with macros. I chalked it up to just having a hungry day. Today would be better, right?
I already ate at 6:45am and then again when I got to work at 8:15am. *sigh*
Breathe. Just hold on. Your body is telling you something. Listen. Learn. Don't lose hope and don't take it as a fault in yourself that your own body is asking for food.
Okay, focus on the positive.
I didn't want to workout. I did, but I didn't. I was nervous. I HATE running on a treadmill but I simply could NOT stomach another COLD run outside IN APRIL! (I literally drove home in a blustering snow storm...in MID-APRIL! No wonder my body is confused - Mother Nature herself is confused!) So, while I didn't want to work out, and I told myself I could just go home and run outside, I walked outside after work and recognized that I would say that, go home, and then chicken out. So I went to the gym.
And even though I felt heavy and weak and slow, I still did run/walk intervals and completed 2+ miles. I set a goal for 2-3 miles and I hit that goal. I stretched, and didn't feel too darn awful. A little twinge in my left hip (odd, it's usually my right), but still felt alright. Today I feel good - not too sore. So apparently the whole running game isn't shot. No going back to day 1, I'll just work from here and keep moving.
And, like I said, no mindless snacking (even those cookies...damn those cookies...I thought about first long and hard). And I drank a lot of liquids - even more water than usual for me. My body MUST know what it's doing and I NEED to listen.
Anyhow, day two. Maybe I won't be hungry all day. I feel good now...30 minutes after I ate! *lol* That's the other thing, I haven't been pushing food down with liquid either. I've been waiting my 30 minutes in between like I've been taught, so it's not that. I'm not abusing my tool on purpose. I have to give it a few more days and see if it settles itself.
Work - lots of it
Working through lunch so I can get out of here a little early.
30 minutes ST at the gym (I'd love 45-60m but I've got a busy day)
And then off to home to grab my son so I can transport him to the board meeting to receive his award.
No plan for cooking tonight - leftovers or stir fry. We've got so many leftovers right now we need to eat up so it's necessary.
WISH ME LUCK!