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jokes and March

Saturday, March 10, 2018

This is our assignment for the Aspire and Inspire sparkteam: What are some things you look forward to doing this month?
1. celebrating the 50th anniversary of my day death
2. more outside walks
3. Walking out the door with just a sweater on instead of a down parka
4 Opening a window for fresh air to clear out the stale air of winter
5 moving the clock forward
What are some of your favorite things about March?
1.more tweeting birds
2. more daylight
3 my sis dog shotzy have more pep
4 shredding the winter weight
5 fish fries
jokes
jokes
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight because by then, your body and your fat are really good friends.
~~~~~
I gave up jogging for my health when my thighs kept rubbing together and setting my pantyhose on fire.
Jun 09
The Redneck Dictionary of Medical Terms before you thinking I am making fun of hillbilly half my family come from the hills of West Virginia
Medical Jokes No Comments » Virgin

Artery…………………………..The study of paintings.
Bacteria…………………………Back door to a cafeteria.
Benign………………………….What you be after you be eight
Cesarean Section…………….A neighborhood in Rome.
CTscan………………………….Searching for kitty.
Cauterize……………………….Made eye contact with her.
Colic…………………………….A sheep dog.
Coma……………………………A punctuation mark.
D & C……………………………Where Washington is.
Dilate……………………………To live long.
Enema…………………………..Not a friend.
Fester……………………………Quicker than someone else.
Fibula……………………………A small lie.
Genital…………………………..Non-Jewis
h person.
G.I.Series……………………….World Series of military baseball.
Hangnail…………………………What you hang your coat on.
Impotent…………………………Distinguis
hed, well known.
Labor Pain……………………….Getting hurt at work.
Medical Staff……………………A doctor’s cane.
Morbid……………………………A higher offer than I bid.
Nitrates………………………….Cheaper than day rates.
Node……………………………..I knew it.
Outpatient……………………….A person who has fainted.
Pap Smear………………………A fatherhood test.
Pelvis……………………………Second cousin to Elvis.
Post Operative…………………..A letter carrier.
Recovery Room…………………Place to do upholstery.
Rectum……………………………Darn near killed him.
Secretion…………………………Hiding something.
Seizure…………………………..Roman emperor.
Tablet……………………………A small table.
Terminal Illness…………………Getting sick at the airport.
Tumor…………………………….More than one.
Urine…………………………….Opposite of you’re out.
Varicose………………………….Near by / close by.





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