Need to find my motivation
Sunday, February 11, 2018
Not sure if this is a blog, a pep talk to myself or self reflection. Does it matter, no not really. What does matter is the essence of the written material.
On January 1, 2018 I put myself on a restart of getting healthy. It was a slow start, but it was a start. I did well for three weeks, lost 4lbs - nothing great but still I it was a loss and I was starting to feel better. I resisted the stromboli and coke my DH brought home, I drank 8 glasses of water a day and exercised regularly. Then the treadmill blew up, I got sick and lastly I had a personal upset, which culiminated in a path of self destruction. First I stopped drinking the water, next the exercise ended and then I succumbed to the muffin, coke, and candy my DH insisted on bringing into the house. What happened? I gained 2lbs back, I feel crappy and most importantly I am disappointed with my absolute lack of self discipline and determination.
My parents used to say "If Glynis says she is going to do something you can believe she will do it. When she puts her mind to it she is unstoppable." They also used to say "If you want an honest answer, ask Glynis."
That is where I am struggling, why am I not unstoppable, what is the real reason for this self sabotage? I have overcome much more adversity in my life than what just happened and it never stopped me. In fact, it made me more determined. So what has changed?
I do not believe I have changed, but I still cannot answer that question. So what do I do about it. I give myself a kick up the butt, pick myself up, dust myself down, start again and keep starting again, and again until I get there. So forget the self pity party and take this challenge by the horns and get on with it.
And get on with it I did today! I got up early, went down and used the new exercise bike that just arrived to replace the treadmill. I did 30 minutes, followed by 7 minutes of strength training my arms and ended with 10 minutes stretching. Guess what? I already feel better about myself and that is the feeling I need to keep reaching for each day. That and a glass of water every hour, every day.