Sunday, January 07, 2018
I'm grieving. I'm grieving my relationship with food, and how it is changing. During the day, my rational mind is in control, and I drink my shakes, and drink my water, and my tea and my broth and I am good, centered. I night I dream of eating lunch at my favorite deli, Red Door Cafe and having a Reuben and a bowel of soup. That's not going to happen for a very long while and not in the quantity as before. I dream of the girls from work going out for lunch, and now, me staying back and working on paperwork - wait that wasn't a dream, that happened Friday, till I ran errands by myself. I dream of the chocolate river that was the Dairy Queen commercial in the 80's. That one woke me up,and I stood in front of the refrigerator and looked at his stupid Apple pie and thought- what happens if I cheat? Steve yells at me, my liver doesn't shrink, surgery is harder, recovery is harder. I had a muscle milk shake instead. To say, my sleep was restless is an understatement. But finally, I sleep well and dreamless and until my body woke up. At noon. I think I needed it.
Now I have to decided what to do today. I have to adult. I have to go to office, and print. I have to work on insurance claims, I have make a list of other adulting that has to get done Mon-Friday.
I have to gather ingredients for saturday event dinner. I need to call my aunt about Saturday event dinner. I need to clean my bed room and change sheets, ext. I need to do more laundry. Grocery list for Bailey.
Errands to do Mon-friday
Monday- met with Dani, Anna, flyers
All over flyers
Monday Farmer's insurance- get packet
Tuesday- go to Gym, sign up, flyers
Wednesday- paybills, order catalogs, order 31,Bank- get Oct-Dec print outs, 50 cash, flyers
Thursday, party city?
Pharmacy on Friday, national pharmacy day and check vitamins.
I got a note from Spark Coach Denise that my blog on 1/6 was edited to remove content about my P**** business. Now I have to figure out a way to talk about my passion, and my day to day life without appearing salesy or offending the guidelines. It will be hard because I blog in three places, Google for P***business, Spark for diet, and facebook for social. I will have to tweek each one.