JUNEAU2010
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Vacillating

Friday, November 10, 2017

I vacillate between furious anger and fear about current politics and my fears about my own future. I vacillate between loving my job and hating my commute. I vacillate, and this is really bad, between thinking about making positive healthy choices for diet and exercise and doing nothing.

Some of you have asked for an update. I am one of those who goes silent when things are not going well. My partner is impatient with my stepfather to the point of near rudeness...BF is also not feeling well. Lack energy, obesity and general ill health. Stepfather is still grieving, has some lifelong challenges and just needs space. I'd love it if someone would help cover the bills, but that's not going to happen.

Stepdad is afraid he is terminally ill. He has had several heart attacks, but says his heart is now healthy. He's had tests that seem to indicate there could be some problems. He is afraid it's cancer. How much of that is his own thought, his age or the fact that Mom died from cancer, I can't tell. What I do know is that the extended family would be crushed to lose another member so soon

My surgery is scheduled for January 9. All I have ever had prior to this has been orthopedic or wisdom teeth extractions. My gall bladder is going to be removed. Praying it's before the chance for pancreatic cancer has started. That's what killed Mom and it was less than weeks.

It's only a matter of time before I report to a different attorney and I have mixed feelings about that.

Looking forward to a visit from Mom Angell's granddaughter and her boyfriend. I never had visitors when I lived in California. Moved here in August and I will have had two visits this year.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • _LINDA
    Sorry to hear about your stepfather's and your concerns about cancer :-(( A proper diet can help prevent it. A low carb keto, unprocessed food diet is becoming the gold standard. Remember the most important fact that sugar is known to feed cancer so avoid it at all costs. And that includes things like juices and artificial sweeteners (several of which are known carcinogens). Find a way to take care of your needs. You are important too. I am glad you are getting visits, that is wonderful! It took years before some of my relatives even saw my second apartment and most of them never even saw my first apartment!
    So very sorry you are going through such a stressful time, prayers and hugs.
    223 days ago
  • BLUEROSE73
    wow. So much going on for you right now. Be sure to do what you can to take some time to take care of you
    224 days ago
  • COURTENAYE
    Hang in there!
    224 days ago
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