Life can be crazy!!
Friday, July 28, 2017
I haven't been on here like I should in a while. Only tracking my fitness. This month has been pretty eventful. We have doing tons that I really haven't had much time to log like I wanted to.
We started this month with camping, 4th of July event, Super Day(fair type event), and Cheyenne Frontier Days (carnival, shows, parades). Then we will be enjoying next month with the county fair, having a long time friend come visit for the eclipse event, one more camping trip, 2 birthday parties and then we start school.
In the midst of all this I have also lost 2 cousins within this past month. And then yesterday we received a message from my aunt that my grandmother is now in hospice and is not doing very well. I have brothers and sisters that are bickering and fighting over the most petty things, which includes gossip about me and even goes so far as ridiculing the person that is relaying the messages about my grandmother and its all because this sister has a bad past, but keeps in touch with my dads family, but the siblings feel she has some sort of motive behind it (I don't believe this). I am a loner, always have been. The youngest of 9. So I truly think differently then my elders. But situations where we need to pull together sometimes goes undone and makes me so heartbroken, that sometimes I just want to throw my hands up and say I'm done and just give up.
Although this summer has been busy, and at time very stressful, I say all this because, I have not taken life for granted and feel blessed to be a part of a great bunch of people that have shown me that life can still go on, even with all the mishaps and family drama.
See this is the first year in 5 years that my little 10 year old great nephew, who has leukemia, has been out of the hospital long enough to be able to enjoy a summer with all of his family. To see him smile and enjoy the moment brings me to reality, that regardless how my siblings treat one another, he teaches me that you need to cherish those that want and love to be around you. Thanking god everyday, that my kids, husband and I can take a moment and appreciate what we have and what we can give, especially to be able to share such special moments with this kid. All my nephew wants, is to live and enjoy life regardless who wants to be in it and regardless how ever long he gets to spend with each, he still loves being with them no matter what. That to me is a great inspiration and I wish others can see what I see when I look at this little boy who literally cherishes everything and everyone around him, because he does not know when his last day will come.
Spending time with him this past month really showed me not to take life for granted, live life to the fullest and cherish every moment. Like the old saying goes, " Tomorrow is not promised and the past is over. Today is all we have." Life is to short for what ifs, should've, anger, resentment, and being unforgiving. I will continue my walk and do the best that I can for however long God will give me and at every chance I get, I will stop to smell the roses, get my feet wet, and even go for a bike ride (I still haven't done that yet, been to busy). Giving up on things is not always a good thing, unless it's a bad thing so then giving up is always the best option. As for my siblings, I can't change who they are, it makes me sad to see such blindness, but hope they will see a new light in life and change for the better. Whether through me, my nephew, or a stranger, one day I pray they will see and feel the happiness I have recently experienced. I am feeling so blessed.