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A day in the life of a "slimming cami vest"

Friday, June 30, 2017

(I apologize in advance: my E key sticks and my C key is broken, so I will probably be editing this a lot today) I awoke far too early today so I decided to stop just looking at that cami. OK so like many of you, I've been bombarded with ads for these miraculous "slimming" vests, camis, capris, thigh sleeves...if you have stubborn body fat on any part of your body chances are there's a neoprene product out there. My first impression upon opening the package is that it smells odd. I'm allergic to latex but there's not supposed to be much (if any). Not sure what size to order, I heeded their advice that it runs small so I ordered 2XL. I guess I should've order a 3 or 4XL as "made in China" implies tiny, petite & thin. Also made in China means that you already know everything about them--like how to care for them or even put them on. I haven't been able to get the capris on yet. To be fair, I've only tried twice but I figure if it's THAT much of a workout just to get them on, I can wait until I've lost a few more pounds. I'm not sure where I read to step into the cami but I did and it wasn't too bad to get it on once I got it over my hips. It is quite snug (duh). The first thing I notice is that the pictures are inaccurate. Every ad I've seen shows a slender woman wearing one so it doesn't bind or roll or (let's see how to explain this part) improperly accentuate her boobs. The ads also show the women going about their day wearing this cami as their shirt, with a sports bra showing. I won't be seen in public with my sports bra showing. QED. The next thing I notice is that it's nearly cutting off circulation to my arms. That could be because it's either cut wrong or I just have huge boobs or both. It stormed last night so it's hot & humid here in Chicago. I went outside to check on my garden. I think I can tolerate the uncomfortable fit around my armpits, I do notice that I'm starting to sweat--isn't that the idea? But I feel it on my lower back, like the cami doesn't quite meet my denim capris. OK I'm sweating, so it's working. So far...
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