PURPLESPEDCOW
250,000-299,999 SparkPoints 259,296
SparkPoints
 

Putting myself first for a change

Thursday, May 18, 2017

I have been on Spark a long time. During that time I have lost the same pounds over and over again. I am tired of the struggle and disappointment and resentment and frustration. I was ready to give up and just quit. I decided to make one last try. I have thought and thought and I know what to do, how to do it, how to plan, track, support others....but I don't support myself.
I have a list of reasons why I want to lose weight, and guess what they all are reasons for other people. Yes I want to play with my grandchildren and see them grow up, but that is for them. They are happy with the way I am right now.
I need concrete reasons why I need to do this for me. Okay so I am diabetic. Nothing new there. Have been since 1994. I have progressed from pills only to adding insulin to the treatment. I have no consequences from the diabetes at this point. And I don't want any!

Reason 1 for me: control blood sugar levels to avoid complications of diabetes.
How to do that: I have to control the night time eating. It isn't an option any more.

Reason 2 for me: remove weight being placed on my feet. I have no cartilage left in my feet and it can be very painful to walk at times. If I want to keep walking, I need to lose weight to help my feet.
How to do that: I have to control the night time eating. It isn't an option any more.

Reason 3 for me: I don't want to continue to look like my sister any more. I don't like how she takes care of herself and she is unable to do much of anything any more.
How to do that: I have to control the night time eating. It isn't an option any more.

Three reasons that are all about me! I have to take care of myself in order to do anything for anyone else. I am going to put myself first for a change starting now.
Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • RORYLYONS
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    503 days ago
  • CFODEL
    I totally get you on losing the same pounds over and over. The diabetes management is super important -- my husband has complications and they aren't fun to deal with. Stay strong and keep the fact that YOU MATTER in the forefront. I know you can do this!
    521 days ago
  • GOOZLEBEAR
    I had a message all typed and lost it!!! I know you are on the right track to taking charge of what you need to do for your health. You come first and you matter! Let me know if I can help or encourage you!!
    521 days ago
  • CHRIS3874
    Good Blog I can only comment for myself but it seems like I have a lot of unresolved feelings and I almost feel like I am avoiding the topic as I am afraid of the answer.
    521 days ago
  • BJK1961
    Truly insightful
    521 days ago
  • MSLZZY
    Take charge and take control and put yourself first.
    This is for you and no one else. Good luck!
    521 days ago
  • LILYSMAM2017
    I too being a people pleaser have tried in the past to lose weight fir all the wrong reasons. .this time and I just came tp this conclusion a cpl days ago..it's for me. I don't like getting out of breath so easily. Good for u 😺
    521 days ago
  • KATIBUG49
    As I was reading your blog, it sounded like somethiing I would write, you are sying the same things I have siad over & over. I'm so glad you are putting yourself first as most of us don't. I won't give up & neither will you, keep strong! emoticon
    521 days ago
  • SASSYSAX
    I am so happy you have decided to put yourself and your health first. No one else can do it except YOU.That is called loving yourself. You deserve to love and take care of yourself. Remember, you are not alone on this
    road. We are all with you on this adventure and support. emoticon
    521 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment


    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.
 

More Blogs by PURPLESPEDCOW