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I Have a "Relationship" With Food? - WTH?

Saturday, May 06, 2017

Many times I have heard, read and even thought about "having a relationship with food." But recently I began to really think about what that means - because I DO. WTH? Why in the world would anyone have a "relationship" with food? Let's consider this further.

Definition of relationship
1: the state of being related or interrelated studied the relationship between the variables
2: the relation connecting or binding participants in a relationship: such as
a : kinship
b : a specific instance or type of kinship
3 a : a state of affairs existing between those having relations or dealings had a good relationship with his family
b : a romantic or passionate attachment

OK. Sure I have a connection with food because I HAVE to. If I don't eat, I die. But there has to be more than that. I don't think kinship applies. Duh. There is definitely "a state of affairs" between me and food ALL THE TIME. That is certainly an issue - we are meeting way too much and for all the wrong reasons. So maybe - I'm in love with food?

What does it mean to be "in love"? Here's part of the definition:

a (1) : strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties maternal love for a child (2) : attraction based on sexual desire : affection and tenderness felt by lovers After all these years, they are still very much in love. (3) : affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests love for his old schoolmates
b : an assurance of affection give her my love
: warm attachment, enthusiasm, or devotion "love of the sea"
a : the object of attachment, devotion, or admiration baseball was his first love
b (1) : a beloved person : darling —often used as a term of endearment (2) British —used as an informal term of address

I guess it could be something like that. I'm definitely "attached" but it's not "warm." I sometimes absolutely HATE food. I HATE that sometimes it is constantly on my mind. I HATE that I can't just abstain (like drug addicts or alcoholics) which would finally help me be free of the constant thoughts about food. I HATE that no matter what I do, food still seems to be a huge controlling factor in my life - "what am I going to eat today, how much do I get to/want to/have to eat today, if I eat that it will be bad, if I eat that it will be good, eat, eat, eat.....AAAGGHHH!

No - it's not being "in love." I think it's something else. Or a combination of something else's. I don't know - actually, it doesn't really frickin' matter. What matters is that with all the progress I've made, I STILL find myself planning what I eat around trying to eat the MOST amount I can (even if it's acceptable) of the MOST delicious thing I can (low carb, high protein) and I still want to eat it alone while watching TV or some other zone out.

SO - here's the plan. Today I'm having a dinner party for friends. I am already stressed about that (although doing much better about NOT stressing so I can just have fun). Tomorrow and this week (I'm at home), I am going to totally practice intuitive eating to the max. I am not going to allow myself to "plan out" food. I am going to eat when I am hungry. I am going to make sure I'm really hungry by staying hydrated and waiting 20 minutes to be sure. I am going to go to the kitchen at that time and get a truly reasonable, measured portion of the healthiest option I can find (not something that sounds or feel comforting). I will sit down at the table and eat without distraction. I will stop when I feel full - no matter what, no matter if I can "make" myself eat more, no matter if I have the calories or not. FOOD IS FUEL. I'm going to treat it that way so that there is no more of this relationship bull snarky going on. Yes, I know it's going to take time. I got time.


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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Intuitive eating--the folks who do this naturally amaze me.

    I am currently "practicing" intuitive eating. Here's what I do. Avoid my trigger foods, eat when hungry until full, give myself permission to be hungry at odd times, take pictures of my meals and then track at night when the eating is done. Then I look at my calories/macros etc. The really cool thing is if I avoid my triggers, then my tracking numbers fall right where they should be. So far it is working for me.

    579 days ago
    Food for thought...something for me to think about emoticon
    583 days ago
    Please don't eat until you are full. That could take forever if it were me. I like the idea of drinking water before meals (16 oz.) and eat a sensible portion controlled meal. For a few days you may have a sense of "not feeling full or satisfied", however, if you do this your body will adjust and it will begin to be satisfied. Eating salads and fresh veggies with good protein will get your body and mind in a good way. I promise! I'm sure the dinner party will go great! emoticon
    583 days ago
    Interesting blog, and thought process. Lot's of food for thought. Great plan... while obviously a work in progress - like all of us - you've definitely got this.

    I really liked this article. Perhaps you'll find it a helpful 'side dish':

    How to Stop Using Food Like a Drug

    584 days ago
    I hope that your dinner party is fabulous! Enjoy your company!
    584 days ago
    You DO "get it!" food = fuel, and that's what I had to constantly remind myself of on this journey. I have been here since 2010 and STILL have to remind myself of that @ times.

    Have a good time!
    584 days ago
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