I'm Still Standing
Sunday, March 19, 2017
I have not written in a very long time. Why?
New grandson lived with us his first full year, is still here a lot. He will be 2 in April.
Our son is now four, and I love him to pieces
My husband had a quadruple bi-pass last Aug. and still doesn't "get it". (That one is hard!)
Our youngest daughter found her college to be toxic, so came home and is looking forward to a fresh start in the fall.
Our oldest daughter is still very much a little girl (she is 24) and will always need support.
I had to begin working full time, and really resent it. I want to raise our son. I want to take care of my home and family.
So, where does this leave me? For quite awhile I have been over stressed, over worked, and drowning. My profession is Early Childhood Education. A profoundly under paid and under valued career. As the Director of my last center I was paid a salary, worked well over 60 hrs a week, and could still not put food on our table. I found a much better paying position in a private academy, and now "only" work 40 hours a week (without taking any work home!) but there are still all of the back bills to pay. While my former position was within a gym, I had no time to utilize the facilities. The job demands were too high.
My new position is in one of the most beautiful Early Childhood settings anyone could ask for, with a lovely walking trail nearby..
A few months ago I found a video about a woman (weighing much more than I) who committed herself to getting to the gym 100 days in a row. Her video was compelling. I have a free gym membership. I should use it. I decided if she could get herself there, so could I! Today will be day 32. I get up about 4am each day to I start my day with my workout. My day is too full, physically and emotionally demanding to allow for an after work session. I often (weather permitting) take a 2 mile walk on my break.
Why oh Why am I doing this to myself?
1: an intense, sweat pouring from every cell workout, clears the brain and the emotions
2: a great workout fuels my day with energy!
3. I am watching my body reclaim itself each day.
4. While I'm 51 with a lot of living to do. My body needs to keep up!
5. I deserve it!