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"Motivation is what gets you started, habits are what keep you going"

Saturday, February 18, 2017

The quote in my title is my current goal and state of mind. The past 2 years I have spent working through some hard mental stuff. I have worked through some insecurities and some incorrect core beliefs. In the past few weeks, I have learned a ton about myself and had many epiphanies. These have lead me to take a step back and change my approach to what I am doing.

1. I didn't start emotionally eating and gaining weight until I married my ex-husband and he found himself in some legal trouble. This trouble of course impacted me. I didn't have the outlets that I used to have or the loving support that I had when I was a teen and living with my parents. Up until I got married I had always been on the too thin side of weight. Sugar and fatty foods became my best friend, my comfort, my lover (I was alone and lonely in my marriage), and my best coping mechanism. I realized that I have been using food to replace love and the needs from a significant other.

2. When I was in good shape and on the lower end of my ideal weight, I had other coping mechanisms for stress. I loved to dance and music. Whenever I was stressed as a teenage, I would go out to my parents garage and dance or choreograph. Well after reading some articles on here (I joined the taming your sweet tooth challenge) I realized that I have turned to sugar because it triggers the same hormones as exercise. That is why the first time that I lost weight I beat my sugar addiction with exercise as well. That is why when I exercise I don't feel like eating those types of food. I already have those hormones to balance me and help me cope. This was a HUGE light bulb moment and motivation. I NEED to exercise if I am going to be successful. I understand that 80% of weight loss happens in the kitchen and I agree with that but for my mental health and ditching these bad habits, I NEED to exercise. Today I started and I did yoga.

3. as weird as it seems, watching certain tv shows is my best therapy. I love Hallmark movies, Gilmore girls, How I Met Your Mother, and This Is Us. They make me want to be better as weird as that sounds.

So I have decided that small habits and steps are in order each week. I need to keep up some of the habits that I have created such as my supplements, water, and daily journaling/ bible reading. Now I am going to add one food, one physical per week. I have decided to call my goals areas my 4 F's for "Food", "Fitness", "Faith", and "Fashion". But more on that another time.
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