Did We Do the Right Thing?
Tuesday, February 14, 2017
We got some very bad news today. My husband's stepfather passed away this morning. It was very sudden--he was playing soccer with his kids on Sunday.
I came home to help my husband make arrangements to get down to Peru, board the dog and all the other things that need to be done. He was thinking to leave tomorrow, but the funeral is Thursday, and after my siblings missed my grandmother's memorial because of flight delays back in August, I thought it would be better to leave today.
But as we were booking tickets, I could tell...I don't know. I could tell he didn't want me to go. He kept saying how he didn't want me to complain about him not translating fast enough or not knowing what's going on, because he wouldn't always know what was going on. I said I just wanted to go to help, and he said I can't. So I asked if he even wanted me to go, and that my feelings wouldn't be hurt if he said that I would be in the way.
There's a big part of me that didn't want to go, either. I was nervous about dealing with all the logistics on this end, boarding the dog, asking for subs for my part-time weekend gig, missing a ton of time I need to work on my quilt making homework, paying for two last-minute flights, dealing with jet lag, and yes, that I would actually be in the way and be dead weight through all this.
But now that my husband is in the air, I am starting to regret this decision. Maybe I should be there. It sucks being here all alone while this is going on, and I know my husband was having a hard time dealing with the travel alone. I don't know if we made the right decision. I just don't know.