GRANDEFILLE
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Journal entry 1

Saturday, February 11, 2017

Not yet a week since I came back. I can't say I have done a lot for the weight loss. I didn't binge. There is that. Those of you who have knowed me for a while know that I can do what I set out to do. I did run the 10k, I went back to school for my bachelor's degree in engineering and going well at it. I have, quite a few times lost a goid amount of Weight, but here I am again and again. I have this problem : when I start behaving and do good, part of me just want to binge. The worst if it is that I am aware of it! When I am happy that I am doing well, I will go to the cupboard or the fridge, without being hungry, and look for the worst thing I could out in my mouth. All the while thinking I shouldn't be doing this. Knowing it is sabotage. I am not hungry, I don't feel deprived I just want to fail. Most of the time, I can't or won't fight it. I have to know why I am doing this. It doesn't make sense. By thevwsy, this is NOT a pity party.This is a statement. Now that I have voiced the problem it is time to address it. So, here are the things I want to accomplish this week,: - buy a new scale to get a starting weight - not binge - track all the food I put in my mouth - find a therapist to help find out what makes me sabotage myself.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • CTUPTON
    oops! emoticon emoticon 10 K !
    631 days ago
  • CTUPTON
    Publicly stating this is HUGE! I am sure it will help you find your way. I am "in the same boat." I have gotten my weight down a few times. Right now at age 69 I am still at it. Two weeks ago everything was under control. The last couple of days I could not get full. Just keep trying. You are doing lots that is healthy! Oh my, a 5K. Wow! You are obviously a strong person. Things will fall into place eventually. Even maintaining is a win. Don't discount the good you have done. You are a WINNER. emoticon Good luck. Keep sparking. The help here is unbeatable! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon chris
    631 days ago
  • no profile photo FITKAT62
    I just watched an educational video called The Science of Changing Your Mind by Joe Dispenza. It is also available in book format. It is a great motivational tool.
    644 days ago
  • DANCINCAJUN1
    great blog...roc emoticon
    645 days ago
  • KING_SLAYER
    Acknowledgement is the first step in the right direction. Who knows, there could have been something that happened when you were a child and it's deep in your memory. At a certain point that old, lingering memory triggers the behavior. I hope you are able to figure it out and banish it forever!
    645 days ago
  • DOVESEYES
    I found I would enjoy my favourites better if I just ate a small bite of them. They became something to linger over :)

    It's so nice to have you back :)
    645 days ago
  • GRANDEFILLE
    I do think that sometimes. Eting like a pig is normal.when fiod is great and it is a special occasion. But binging for no apparent reason is a problem
    645 days ago
  • BESSIEBELL
    Good for you. Our relationship with food is a difficult one. It is not as if we can give it up. Not like smoking. We still have to eat. I have found it easier to make one small change at a time and build on that.
    645 days ago
  • MARIHELEN
    Good on ya. You got this
    645 days ago
  • QUINNY2016
    Good job! You are doing wonderful. I binge too. Is it just a fact of life?????
    645 days ago
  • QUINNY2016
    Good j
    645 days ago
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