A BIG leap of faith...believe in myself
Friday, January 06, 2017
Several years of holding my weight loss have come and gone. I have been maintaining a 65-70 lb weight loss for almost 7 years now and it is time to finally time to do something drastic. I'm not talking about drastic as in climbing a high peak or running a marathon. No, I've done that and I'm full of confidence in my physical abilities these days.
What I'm talking about is on a way deeper emotional and mental level. Some of you may understand me, I needed to clear out the closets of years of "fat clothes" that no longer fit and have not fit in a long time. Why do I hold on to these clothes as though they are some kind of security blanket? Let's face it, there was no security in those 70 lbs and there is none in closets bursting at the hinges.
I was scared for a long time. Very scared. Finally I had a good talk with myself and realized
that I needed to take that leap of faith. I needed to finally accept who I have become in the past 7 years and believe in myself enough to know that I am never going back to that size or that girl.
I believe in the lifestyle changes that I have made. I believe in my toolbox of healthy living plans and ideas that have been proven by me to work. I believe in my constant monitoring of my health. I believe in my exercise and healthier eating. I believe in the people that I choose to associate with these days who are on the same healthy path.
I believe that I have come too far on this road to turn around and go back to my unhealthy ways. I have lived the change and felt the benefits and rewards in ways that I have never imagined. How could I ever believe that I would wear any of those clothes again?
No, I have more faith in myself now also, but sometimes I still on some emotional level have the insecurities. The fat insecure girl is still hiding in the shadows knowing that she will fit into those clothes again someday because she is a failure. (Sad but true) NO! Not today.
Today the brave and healthy spirit inside me is taking over again! If I can do what I have accomplished in the past 7 years, I can let of go of those clothes also. Actually kind of silly I guess, but I now have 10 bags of useless to me clothing that maybe someone else can appreciate. Donation box here I come.
I believe in me and all I have gained since choosing my health. Sparkpeople is on the top shelf of my tool box and there it will stay.
NEVER GOING BACK!