_COSMOPAULATAN_
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Get In the Shape of Happy

Sunday, January 01, 2017

So, in my excitement to get to my Nia class this morning, I forgot for everyone else in the world it's the day of fresh starts and resolutions because for me it's just Sunday. Yeah... 47 people in my class instead of the normal 15. emoticon

I am so very happy to see 2016 disappear like a bad dream. Bye bye, never come back! emoticon

I had a good start to my 2017. I was out on a date where we danced all night. The equivalent of 4 miles actually. Not too shabby! emoticon

The reason for this blog, outside of the fact it's the obligatory Happy New Year blog, is that I felt a sense of gratitude last evening as I was dancing. Gratitude that earlier this year, I wouldn't have been able to dance for hours. Gratitude that earlier this year, a 10 minute walk was a victory. Gratitude that earlier this year, I had nearly given up on myself. But I didn't.

I'm still here, and interestingly enough, I'm in a better place. Did I lose any weight this year? No. Did I eat like a champ? Nope... not even close. Did I start running again like I've been talking about for the last... ahem... 5 years? No. No running did I do. So what, you ask, has me in a better place than I was earlier this year?

I found movement again. Movement that started small... really small... 10 minute walking small... but it started. And better than starting, it's continued. I worked REALLY hard to letting go of my mindset about what constituted movement and negotiated a kinder mindset to transition me back into activity. That was an extremely difficult task for this perfectionist who used to only count "real, intentional, get-to-the-gym" exercise as exercise. But I made it work:

10 times in May
9 times in June
3 times in July
6 times in August

Maybe it was mowing the lawn, or cleaning the house, or taking a short walk break at work... but it was movement. The longer I worked on making small things count, the easier it because to recognize small things as valuable and having worth.

When September rolled around, I wanted more for myself. I became intentionally more intentional about choosing movement. I started incorporating longer walks - 20 minutes, then 30 minutes, then 40 minutes, then a 5K - added in hiking the beautiful trails Minnesota has to offer and taking super fun fitness classes like Bolly X, Nia, and Zumba. One thing turned into another, and then the next thing you know, movement looked like:

11 times in September
16 times in October
10 times in November
9 times in December

So I have a lot to be grateful for because, now? Now I don't wake up every day hating myself and how I look. Now I feel a sense of amazement for what my body does for me, all day every day, and a sense of sorrow for how I've treated it all these years. Now I know I have a fresh chance to do right by myself, do right by my body, do right by my soul.

In my Nia class this morning, the meditation at the end included the following statement:

DO WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO DO TO GET BACK TO WHO YOU ARE MEANT TO BE.

Maybe I'll run again. Maybe I won't. But I have rediscovered Joy in movement, and I find myself so thankful.

Cheers to 2017!
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