falling away or standing up
Sunday, November 06, 2016
The last year has been a struggle. My work was stressful, with long hours, bringing work home, extremely difficult students, and low pay.
My home life is stressful with an unhealthy husband who had open heart surgery last August and lost his job. We lost our insurance shortly after that. Our oldest daughter still struggles greatly and our youngest daughter is away at college dealing with depression and post traumatic stress from living with her sister, and our little man (age 3.75) has his own issues going on, we just aren't sure what they are yet.
Somewhere in all of that I lost my focus. it's hard to get in a work out when you are trying to figure out how to put food on the table, keep a roof over everyone's head, and pay the bills. Eating "right" is super expensive. Folks tell me "go to the food shelf". Well, I feel like a food snob when I do that, because I want to feed my family "food" not processed, live in a shelf for 8 years, products that aren't really food. Some food shelves do have produce, but it's over the edge, (not really fresh) and difficult to eat. Whole foods that are less expensive are very high in carb, like rice. But rice and tuna are indeed staples so we eat that quite a bit.
So, there is the falling down portion of my post.
Standing up! I left my highly stressful position for a less stressful, much better pay position at a new school. I love my job! I love my hours, and my coworkers. The families we work with are amazing.
I am getting out for a walk each day. That will end soon, as I am really not a fan of winter. Making myself walk outside when it's 10 degrees or less will be a huge challenge. I will figure something out.
I am served profoundly delicious meals each day for lunch, so I will move to salads for dinner.
I can and will find workouts I enjoy from home.
Insurance will kick in in January, and my husband will need to focus on himself in new ways.
I will continue to support our oldest daughter and our little grandson in all the ways I can and remember she is an adult and needs to be one.
My little man is a joy and a delight and I am so happy to call him son!
My youngest daughter is the joy of my life! I can and will coach her through this and she will come out as the beautiful butterfly that she is.
I can do this, I can stand up and stand tall! So can you!