Wednesday, November 02, 2016
I feel as though in the past two weeks that I was off.( 1. Due to my son having an accident and then getting sick and 2. I got sick myself. ) I have realized that although I have a huge goal of losing 100 lbs by next September. I do not have any little milestone goals to encourage my success now.
I feel like goals are important but I also feel as though for me they are self Sabotage. I come up with a goal that is either too easy or too hard and I either make it and lose it again or I fail and quit.
Well this time I have three things that are keeping me going. 1. My son, I want to set an example for him and make him proud. 2. My family, I don't want my jeans to reflect my genes. Just because my family is bigger doesn't mean I have to be. They have diabetes and high blood pressure and although I don't have then now. I don't want then later. And lastly... 3. I want this for the first time in my life so bad. I want to succeed. I want to push the boundaries that I have established for myself and say to that nasty little voice in my head, "I am worth it. I was worth it yesterday but didn't know it. I was worth it today, and I showed it. And I'll be worth it tomorrow because I tried like hell today!"
I know I can do this. I know that I am worth the healthier me even when the numbers don't move. My clothes feel better. My son can hold on tighter. I fit into things I haven't in a while and most importantly...I feel better about myself.
So here is my first goal: I want to lose 18 lbs by 1/1/17. That will put me at 220. The lowest that I have been in 10 years!!! I can do this because I want this and I am worth it!!!