One small victory at a time

Tuesday, October 11, 2016

Yesterday was a "typical Monday". Work was hectic, and for some reason I was just in a low emotionally. I got home from work and walked my dog, and even though I just wanted go to bed for an extra long nap, I told myself to just try my workout. It's on a dvd, and I could not for the life of me get it to play! I had just used the dvd player late last week with no problem, but for some reason today it wasn't happening no matter what I tried. So sadly I ended up giving up, and I didn't get to do my planned workout. This didn't help my already bummed out mood, and even after my nap I felt like a storm cloud. But after dinner (which I managed to keep portion controlled!), my husband and I took the dog for another walk, so not all was lost in my goal to get moving every day.

This morning when I got to work (mind you, this is nearly 3:00am), I saw it... the box of fancy, huge donuts and donut like treats... and no one else around. At first I ignored it, then I got curious and looked inside. Man, did they look good! I watched my hand reach out for one... it was the smallest, plainest one in the box. Surely that would make it ok, right? But by some small miracle, and will-power that I'm not used to having, I stopped just short of picking it up. I put the lid back on and walked away!

I've been beating myself up lately because I haven't had any progress in a couple of months now. I know this is because I haven't been trying, and I allowed myself to get back into my old habits. I've gained back what I had lost since the beginning of the year (about 12 pounds), which might not seem like much, but it is so frustrating because it feels like when I finally start to get somewhere, I slip and end up right back at the beginning again.

I think part of the problem is I am too worried about doing everything perfect all the time, and don't appreciate the small victories. Yesterday was a bad day for me, and yet I stayed in my calorie range, and went for 2 walks. Even this morning I stopped myself from eating that donut, even though there wouldn't have been any witnesses! As hard as it is, I'm going to try to focus on each step, and when I stumble I want to make my next decision a good one, instead of letting it be a domino effect.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Makes you feel good doesn't it? Knowing that you really can be in control of that little devil that sits on one shoulder telling you, go ahead. When that little angel on the other shoulder wins out you win too. Good for you and cheer up.
    925 days ago
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