You would think I would learn after multiple failures, but still in the last month I've been full of poor choices.
As a teacher, the end of the year is full of lots of excitement. Prom, graduation parties, and farewell parties. I tried to make smart choices and in the beginning I did alright making smart choices with one to two slips ups. Those slip ups became more and more frequent, but I continued to work out.
Then came the trips. The wedding was difficult enough because I was fed for every meal with little to no choice about what I ate, but I walked all over Chicago and I usually only ate 2 meals a day, so I convinced myself I wasn't doing that bad. I new it wasn't pretty, but still I ate and drank and drank and drank.
I was home 26 hours before I was back off to visit my sister in Portland. The trip was awesome, but we drove a lot more and gorged ourselves for breakfast, lunch, happy hour and dinner. Again I ate and drank and ate and drank, enjoying every second of my vacation. I walked and hiked some but not enough to burn off the calories I was consuming. At the end of the trip I started to feel guilty, but didn't change anything I just told myself I would get back on track as soon as I got home.
Well now I'm home and I thought I'd get right back into the swing of things. I didn't.... I started working out right away and that feels pretty good, but I was still eating and drinking like I was on vacation. The guilt was starting to get to me, and I'd wake up and start strong, and then as the day went on I caught myself snacking and socially eating without abandon. I think as the guilt set in I ate more to cover for my feelings of guilt.
Well this morning I started over, yet again. I may not make it within my range today, but I'm closer than I've been in about 3 weeks. I haven't weighed in yet, and I shouldn't avoid it, but I'm still nervous about the damage. My lesson, that lead me to this blog, came when i went and got my monthly massage. Everything hurt my neck, my back, my legs, my foot. It was almost miserable. At one point my massage therapist asked me if I had lost any weight recently. I shamefully told her no and she said she suggested my eating and drinking over the last few weeks could be part of the reason my muscles were so sore. That was motivation enough for me.
No more crap for me! Time to get back up there and do it again.