JJMPLSMN
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A river cuts through rock

Wednesday, June 08, 2016



A river cuts through rock, not because of it's power, but it's persistence.

Oh, how true this is. I have used this graphic before, but never did it mean so much, thinking about my Father, his incredible strength, and his ability to manage my Mother's fading memory with not only love, but compassion.

My Dad is a gem. He is an awesome man, and last night my darling Daughter, her BF, Mom and Dad and me went out to dinner. Mom was unable to follow the conversation. Mom was unable to remember basic things about me and my Daughter. She told her BF that it was nice to meet him, and she has met him a number of times. My sadness over all of this, is powerful.

My thankfulness, that my parents found each other, at the University of Iowa, fell in love, and remain in love to this day, is one powerful and magnificent bit of luck, in a difficult journey.

My parents are leaving tomorrow, to finish their road trip home. Dad seems unburdened by Mom's illness. He seems to take it in stride. He has been the rock for our whole family, and we have been able to look to him for the most sage of advice. He is the example of how to treat someone with increasingly awful memory issues with love and dignity.

I could not be prouder to be his daughter today, and every day for that matter. I told him that at dinner, and thanked him for all he has done for me, and gave him a card and a couple of books for Father's Day. He isn't good with compliments, and my effusive praise just makes him nod. He already knew how I felt, but it felt good to tell him. Mom had tears in her eyes. I think there is a part of her that knows how important this wonderful man is to her, and it touches me deeply.

Thanks, Mom and Dad for being an example of how to be, how to treat people, how to live life with love, dignity and fun. I will never be as good as you are, and that's OK with me.

Spark on.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • SPARKLINGME176
    Yes! Bitter-sweet. Thank you for sharing with SP!
    1766 days ago
  • HARRIETT14
    You know they say "The apple doesn't fall far from the tree". I'm sure that you are very much like your parents. They showed you the way as you are showing your darling daughter.
    1767 days ago
  • DS9KIE
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    1768 days ago
  • RAZZOOZLE
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    1768 days ago
  • OBIESMOM2
    it's nice to see people who genuinely care for others in their lives. That might become a lost art - 'til death us do part'.

    I'm glad that they have each other. And I'm glad that they have YOU!
    1768 days ago
  • L*I*T*A*
    what great role models for you..........

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    1768 days ago
  • SRWYLIE
    Based on what I know about you, your strength and tenacity, I can imagine what your dad must be like. I still see him in that red plaid Christmas vest! He's awesome, just like his darling daughter and granddaughter. It's heartbreaking to hear about what your mom is going through, and that she is likely to get worse. I hope your parents have a good support system to help take care of her. (One of my favorite instructors is dealing with a similar issue with her dad, who has Alzheimer's, and her mom, with Parkinson's. They live in a too-big house and need live-in care.)

    I hope that all of our parents are able to recognize when they need help, and accept it when it's provided. I'm so glad that your parents have you to love them and care about them.

    Hugs to you all!
    1769 days ago
  • no profile photo CD15665102
    That's so beautiful.
    1769 days ago
  • SNOWDOESIT
    He sounds like an absolutely amazing man. emoticon
    1769 days ago
  • ONEKIDSMOM
    emoticon What a great tribute to your father and for that matter, to your mother, weathering a difficult condition with grace and love, compassion and kindness.

    May we all learn from examples such as these! Spark on!
    1769 days ago
  • PJDANIELS
    You are so blessed to have such a father, and your mom as well. That's true love, to do what he does, because he wants to, not has to.
    1769 days ago
  • MEWHENRYSMAMA
    Oh Jane...what a bittersweet story!
    I have such emotion as the thought of your father caring for your Mom as he does is so priceless and precious! And the saying actions speak loader than words certainly comes to my mind! I am so sorry your Mom is unable to be her true self and enjoy what is around her, but I am so happy for her she has a devoted husband who will take care of her and be with her! They, and you, are in my prayers for comfort and strength in dealing with this bittersweet time!
    I am glad you got to express your feelings to you Dad...
    Love & Hugs,
    Mary
    P.S. I loved the graphic and saved it! It's a keepsake!
    1769 days ago
  • no profile photo CD13354694
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    1769 days ago
  • 1CRAZYDOG
    Ok, I cried reading this. Mom has Alzheimer's and Dad has cared for her lovingly and patiently. They live with me, so I help, too. But it touches me. This is a man of VERY few words, but his actions . . . Lord, they speak volumes . . . and volumes.

    HUGS sweetie. As a daughter it is hard to watch our MOm's decline, **SIGH**
    1769 days ago
  • no profile photo JEANNETTE59
    A lovely tribute to your parents and the love they share. They have taught you well and you in ture have taught your daughter.

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    1769 days ago
  • SEAJESS
    emoticon Bless you and your family and the Light and Love you manifest. Be gentle with yourself in this very difficult time.
    1769 days ago
  • MPLSKEN
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    This post warmed my heart. You and your family are so lucky!
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    1769 days ago
  • PHOENIX1949
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    1769 days ago
  • PACEKA1
    You are so lucky to have such a wonderful father. He sounds like someone who will do whatever needs to be done, and such love for your mom is something to be treasured. I believe my dad had that kind of love for my mom but I'm not so sure she appreciated it until after he died. More than once she made remarks that reflected on her wish that she had done some things differently. I always felt blessed to have a dad that I could go to anytime for any reason. I wish your parents safe travels back to California! I'm so glad you were able to have this time with them.
    1769 days ago
  • no profile photo CHAYOR73
    You are indeed lucky to have a father as him, and your mom to have fallen in love with a guy like him, not many of them around.
    1769 days ago
  • KRISZTA11
    Your Dad is really a gem.
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    1769 days ago
  • CARMEN213
    Beautiful !
    1769 days ago
  • CREID2016
    Hate auto correct!
    1769 days ago
  • CREID2016
    Wow. This toucher my heart! Made me think about my grandmother! And what a lucky lady you are to have such a great dad! I live my parents and grateful for them! You are Blessed!
    1769 days ago
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